This March 1st marks World Self-Harm Awareness Day with the aim of understanding what leads a person to harm themselves, educating society to remove the stigma and inviting those who do it to seek help.
Some people have episodes in which wounds or pain are inflicted through blows, cuts, burns, among many other injuries that do not necessarily have the intention of taking life.
However, it is not easy to understand what is behind these behaviors; may be motivated by suffering from some type of disorder, discomfort with some aspect of your life, feeling lonely or other psychological problems that need treatment so that they do not escalate.
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World Self-Harm Awareness Day “was created to expand awareness and understanding” of these situations, “break typical stereotypes and myths,” as well as make a “call to professionals about this problem,” explains the during the commemoration, and adds:
“Those who harm themselves often feel alone. They are afraid to seek help for fear of being seen as ‘crazy.’”
Why does a person self-harm?
The psychologist Eliana Álvarez explained in an article in that all people have different reasons that lead them to harm themselves because “They tend to mistakenly think that by causing themselves physical pain they reduce psychological pain that is intolerable to them.”.
In that sense, the doctor assures that “through self-harm they seek to regulate unpleasant emotions, while at the same time trying – non-verbally – to ask others for help. And it is precisely an inability to control or express their emotions in an adequate way that leads them to hurt themselves.
For its part, the SIA adds that “some self-injure to put an end to a state of dissociation or to end a feeling that harasses them and that they cannot control, or they even resort to harming themselves when They are in such emotional turmoil that they don’t know what they are feeling. Self-harm manages to bring them back to reality. Self-harm manages to focus them on a pain that they can describe and justify.”
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That’s why It is necessary to watch for suspicious scars, wounds that do not heal or worsen, increasing isolation, putting away sharp items, avoiding social activities, using a lot of Band-Aids, and even changes in the way of dressing to only wear long clothes that cover much of the body. body.
Causes of self-harm
Álvarez clarified that each person may have different motivations, depending on their context, but he listed some general situations that these people face and that can lead them to harm themselves:
- A bad relationship with the family.
- Low self-esteem.
- Emotional, school or relational problems.
- Bullying.
- Mood disorders.
- Rejection of physical changes or body image.
- Depression.
- Stress.
- Anxiety.
- Eating disorders.
- Need to attract attention
- Need to belong to a group.
Meanwhile, the International Self-Harm Society also points out that it is It is important to understand that not everything is self-harm and that some practices do not fall into this concept if they are done with the main purpose of obtaining “sexual pleasure, decorating your skin, spiritual enlightenment through a ritual or being part of a group.”
How to detect that a person is self-harming?
Dr. Álvarez gave a couple of keys to trigger an alert in families, as she pointed out that “in general, this type of behavior begins in adolescence,” as it is a stage in which constant changes and crises are faced.
- They usually have extremely intense interpersonal relationshipsthey do not manage impulses and do not tolerate frustration.
- Shows absolutely dependent emotionally and present dichotomous attitudes: they love and hate strongly.
How to help someone who self-harms?
The International Self-Harm Society advises that once a person finds out that someone close to them is harming themselves, the first thing to do is don’t pretend you already know. For this reason, he gave guidelines to confront these behaviors in those close to him:
- In order to help your daughter, your partner, your friend, the first thing is understand behavior. Self-harm is a behavior that is difficult to understand, and due to a lack of information we often have incorrect ideas about what it is.
- Our first reaction is almost always to ask the person who is self-harming to stop doing it. To have an idea of what it means to stop self-harm, you must understand what it serves them and their reasons.; At the same time, they must be taught patience, give themselves self-love, have other options and invite them to go to therapy and ask for help from specialists.
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In addition, some advice collected by the SIA from other psychologists indicates that you should show understanding, not give them ultimatums and acknowledge the pain.
The recommendations were completed by psychologist Álvarez, pointing out that “ask for a psychiatric and psychological evaluation to determine what is behind this dangerous behavior, do not stigmatize the person; show concern, containment and give space to dialogue; do not judge them or scold them”, and considers that the participation of the patient’s family in the treatment is necessary.
In treatment, explains the SIA, People who self-harm will learn “new mechanisms that allow them to manage their emotions and thus teach them appropriate techniques as alternatives to self-harm.”. This therapeutic work is based on the fact that once the patient understands their patterns of self-violence and stabilizes, then they can begin to work with the problems that underlie self-harm. This does not imply that patients should be forced not to harm themselves. Any attempt to reduce or control the amount of self-harm that a person does must be based on the patient’s desire to undertake the difficult work of controlling or stopping self-harm.”.