The lack of affection in the couple is evidenced by the lack of emotional expression received from the couple. It is defined as a lack of love that is not satisfied where the affection received is not what was expected.
Generally, this lack of affection is associated with the period of childhood and with the needs that were not satisfied at that stage. It could have been generated under a primary nucleus where affective expressions, closeness and attachment did not exist.
On the contrary, there are people who have received love from their parents and yet feel this lack of affection. In these cases, individuals do not receive value and autonomy to be able to fully develop. In this Psychology-Online article, we will delve into the causes of lack of affection in a couple, symptoms, consequences and how to act in these cases.
Causes of lack of affection in a couple
The fundamental affection for every person and even more so when they are in an emotional relationship. In these cases, practicing affection is essential to have a healthy relationship. Shows of affection, through details, strengthen emotional ties.
According to Morales (2016), expressions of affection are cultivated in courtship and are sustained until the moment of making a more serious commitment. In this context, a comfort zone is sought and, many times, a selfish behavior waiting for the other person to make us happy. This contributes to the development of discomfort in the emotional relationship, conflicts and emotional needs.
Next, we will explain what are the main causes of lack of affection in a couple:
- Emotional deficiencies in childhood: have an impact on the emotional and psychological development of the infant. Affection, love and protection in the first years of life are of utmost importance for the development of the person. In this article, we tell you.
- Need for protection: the person needs affection to feel safe. Otherwise, the lack of affection generates insecurity, distrust and that can have an impact on the relationship.
Importance of love and affection in a couple
Caresses and affection are important factors for the optimal evolutionary development of a person. It is received from birth and, despite being adults, we all need it. Are essential elements for human development.
It is also worth noting that excessive affection during childhood, linked to material goods, causes a lack of autonomy and self-esteem for face life situations. Whatever the context, the problem arises when the lack of affection in the couple controls the decisions made when establishing an emotional relationship, especially when making an emotional display.
Symptoms of lack of affection in a couple
Now that we have seen what the lack of affection may be due to, let’s see what the main symptoms of a lack of affection in a couple are:
- Discomfort due to the lack of gestures or words of affection: It happens when those gestures that were present at the beginning of the relationship are now no longer there because the emotional relationship has matured.
- Passion decreases: This results in a lack of affection in the couple, a lack of understanding and a lack of details with the other person.
- Lack of tact and subtlety: There is constant criticism towards the partner that generates discomfort and sadness in the other person. Normally, unaffective and assertive language is used.
- Lack of communication and defensive attitude: This can give signs that love has faded or is no longer the same as before. Sometimes, it is because they miss the details that the couple had in the falling in love phase.
It is important to highlight that there are people who are not affectionate and do not like to show their affection. They tend to be closed and uncommunicative throughout the relationship. This does not mean that the love for the couple faded, but that it is part of their behavior.
Consequences of lack of affection in a couple
According to Sánchez, L. (2018), the consequences of a lack of affection in a couple are the following:
- Custom: in relationships it is known as inertia. Two people decide to stay together without being clear about the reasons. Although it is not a serious consequence, it is not conducive to having a healthy relationship.
- Infidelity: the absence of love, gestures and affection can cause dissatisfaction that leads to sentimental frustration and . When it happens, there are people who look for that satisfaction in someone else who is not their partner.
- Lack of comunication: If you bring up the topic repetitively, this can lead to a lack of interest and fatigue in the couple. As a consequence, the relationship does not evolve, leading the person to close down and become exhausted.
- Demotivation in the emotional relationship: The lack of affection in a couple can cause a complicated emotional situation and affect the workplace, relationships, and family.
How to act when faced with a lack of affection in a couple
Emotional relationships tend to be complex, especially when you are looking for an ideal partner, for whom you are willing to risk everything. In these cases, people usually build unreal parameters of the relationshiplike constant displays of affection, and that generates emotional stability.
If you are wondering how to act when faced with a lack of affection in a couple, then
- Recognize that you have one.
- Seek help from a professional in the area of mental health.
- Change the dynamics of the relationship: Good communication is necessary to be able to express what each person feels and understand each other better.
It is important to highlight that at the beginning of the relationship, in , couples are very emotional and show their affection through gestures, hugs and caresses. When the relationship matures they may decrease, but other important aspects in the relationship such as trust and admiration are also added. Discover .
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to Lack of affection in a couple: causes, symptoms, consequences and how to actwe recommend that you enter our category.
References
- Morales, M. (2016). Affection and relationship. Degree work to qualify for the title of psychologist. Rafael Landívar University. Retrieved from: http://recursosbiblio.url.edu.gt/tesiseortiz/2016/05/42/Morales-Dulce.pdf
- Sánchez, L. (2018). Women’s Journal. Recovered from: https://www.diariofemenino.com/articulos/amor/pareja/5-fatales-consecuencias-de-la-falta-de-amor-en-pareja/