When facing a difficult moment, resilience can be your greatest ally with a strengthened and realistic attitude.
The term resilience began to sound loud in our environment as a result of the pandemic. Although perhaps some already knew its meaning before, Facing mandatory confinement, working and studying from home, losing a job, losing a family member or friend due to the virus or becoming infected with Covid-19 made us face painful emotions from which we surely feel we cannot escape.
And, although the figures of the deterioration of mental health around the world led several experts to express that it is the other side of the pandemic, many managed to overcome it and that was thanks to resilience.
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In engineering we talk about resilience to express the return of a material to its natural state, in ecology it is used to indicate the capacity of an ecosystem for its regeneration, while in psychology it refers to the capacity that human beings have. to make a correct adaptation in the face of adversity.
What can they be?
Traumatic events, tragedies, family or relationship problems, and serious health, financial, and work problems can lead to recovery after a difficult experience.
“When we are not able to change a situation, simply because it gets out of our hands, we are faced with the challenge of changing ourselves, each one is the one who determines how we are living the present and allows stress, anxiety or The anguish that things are not ending or are not going as expected dominates day to day life,” says Jennifer Ruíz Suárez, psychologist at Neuraxis Clínica Neuropsicologica Integral.
Virginia González, psychologist, highlights that:
It is important to know that resilience is not a trait that people have or do not have, but rather it is a concept that includes a series of behaviors, thoughts and actions that can be learned and progressively developed by anyone who sets their mind to it.
“It is also something common; it is not an extraordinary ability. People normally demonstrate resilience throughout their lives. Being resilient does not mean not feeling pain, discomfort or not encountering difficulties in the face of adversity; resilience starts from a point of realistic view, of the confidence that the blow received will not destabilize us if we face it, accept it and use it to improve our lives. We cannot live convinced that there are no problems because that distances us from reality and causes it to hit us harder when we decide to approach her again,” psychologist Rocío Rivero assures
How does it develop?
“Resilience develops at the same time as emotional intelligence because if you have enough emotional intelligence you can solve your difficulties, regulate yourself, and that generates better resilience,” adds Ruíz.
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Although the expert affirms that to develop it it is not necessary to follow a few steps or a series of instructions because resilience is built as a result of the way in which we experience situations, it can be acquired from childhood depending on upbringing and the influence of parents when it comes to solving complicated or stressful situations that the child observes and copies. You can also take into account some keys to being a resilient person:
Have self-knowledge:
It is important that you know yourself, analyze your skills and weaknesses, know what affects you negatively and work on it. Creating an image full of capacity and strength will allow you to see the resources you have to solve adverse situations.
Have emotional self-control:
Accept that you can cry and feel low, sad, down, but at the same time you must learn to do so and regulate those emotions to strengthen yourself.
Possess impulse control:
When something happens that affects you, you tend to react through impulse according to what you are feeling. In this case, it is key that you learn to detect the first signs of tension to be able to stop in time and distance yourself from the thoughts so that they do not act. by yourself. This will also allow you to reflect and make decisions that do not generate negative consequences.
Show optimistic attitude:
When something negative happens, you see everything “very black” and thoughts that you will never again be able to be the person you were before cross your mind. However, if you analyze the situation from a positive and optimistic point of view, you will realize that everything happens for a specific reason and how terrible it seemed to you at the beginning will not always be that way.
Accept reality:
Resilient people are objective, so you must learn to analyze and manage objectively and without maximizing or minimizing the consequences of what has happened. You have to accept reality as it presents itself.
Learn to arise or grow from problems:
No matter how bad the situation you are going through, learn something. Resilient people view negative situations as learning processes about themselves.
Having a sense of humor and reacting positively is important:
When there is nothing you can do to avoid it, the way you behave will affect you psychologically in the days that follow. Learn to laugh at bad days and problems.
Set realistic goals:
Goals are important because they include the capacity for commitment and are related to motivation, which depends on whether or not you achieve your purpose.
Stop thinking about it:
If there is no solution, stop thinking about the situation and that everything is going to go from bad to worse. At times like this, focus on activities that require a lot of attention, such as playing chess or reading a book on a topic that you don’t have much knowledge about, but that you find interesting.
Take care of relationships with others:
When you go through a difficult time, the first people who are there to support you are your closest friends and family. So regardless of the medium of communication, keep your relationship strong.
Do sport:
By practicing some physical activity you develop a series of personal and social values that make you a more resilient person without you realizing it. This is thanks to the fact that you set challenges for yourself, increase self-discipline, self-knowledge, self-esteem and more.
What benefits do resilient people have?
There are many benefits derived from being a resilient person, such as:
- Have fewer mood disorders.
- Know how to deal with all types of situations.
- Enjoy better physical and mental health.
- Live more satisfied.
- Have better results at work and in daily life.
- Accept people without criticizing or judging them.
- Help other people take a positive attitude towards life.
- Take more risks in life.
Do you want to train your resilience?
If you want to be a resilient person and you don’t know how to achieve it, you can contact us. Going to a psychologist can also help you develop certain characteristics. .