It may be common for parents to have a favorite child, and for that reason discord, jealousy and other aspects are generated in the relationship between siblings. How to handle it? An expert answers.
Is it bad for parents to have a favorite child?
Each family is an organism that throughout life creates its own balance, which is why within the dynamics situations may arise that are sometimes perceived as favoritism. The truth is that These situations arise mostly because within the same family nucleus a certain affinity develops between parents and children due to specific traits such as: character, personality, values, among others.
These situations can be perceived as something negative for other members of the nucleus, since in some way when a child perceives favoritism for another member of the nucleus it can cause insecurities and even frustration on a personal level.
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How to detect that this favoritism exists?
The degree of parent-child attachment also depends on the affinity in tastes and shared values, in this way it could be detected if there is “favoritism.”
Should it be corrected?
Rather than correcting, you must understand the why. When these types of attachment are identified, it is important for parents to extend this affinity to their other children, in order not to affect their self-esteem and to work together to achieve harmony at the family level.
How should children act in this dynamic?
It is important that parents and children promote dynamic spaces in order to establish those ties, which allow the consolidation of relationships of trust and commitment at the family levelIn addition to promoting assertive communication, establishing spaces that are not only moments of recreation but also of self-knowledge and understanding of the role of each of the family members.
Can this fact trigger negative consequences?
Consequences such as children who grow up with insecurity, low self-esteem, anxiety, lack of decision-making, as well as poor relationships on an emotional level.
Is it possible that envy is generated?
Yes, in many cases rivalry can arise between siblings with confrontations that could alter family life.
To take into account:
How can a (non-favorite) child broach the topic with parents?
- The most important thing is to create a space where there can be a active listening.
- Always communicate the message clearly from one’s own perspectiveindicating what emotions are being generated by favoritism (sadness, anxiety, fear, anger, etc.).
- Indicate what are the specific situations where this favoritism has been perceived.
- Express what aspects of the relationship paternal-filial would be appropriate to correct.
- Establish new scenarios that allow strengthen relationships relatives.