When in doubt about your value, it is important that you understand what it means and how to strengthen it. These are the recommendations of an expert.
On several occasions we worry more about what others think or evaluate about us than what we ourselves think, so much so that we may not give ourselves the value we deserve and, on the contrary, we devalue the skills and virtues we possess.
For this reason, we spoke with Laura Sánchez, a PQEB psychologist with specialization in school neuropsychology, evaluation and treatment of affective and emotional disorders and bioneuroemotion to learn about its meaning and the importance of valuing and loving yourself every day.
PQEB: What is eigenvalue?
Dr. LAURA: The eigenvalue is the evaluation that a person makes of himself and, from this, recognizes himself as a valuable and capable human beingwhich deserves respect and consideration from others.
It is important to differentiate the own value of the own values; these They are the deepest desires that each individual has in relation to the way in which they want to project themselves and interact with different people., situations and contexts that surround him, as well as with himself. There are governing principles that can guide and motivate us, values reflect what you want to do and how you want to do it.
These principles or values have to do with different areas of your life, and help you define how you want to behave to get closer to your friends, your family, your environment, work, yourself, etc.…
From this vision proposed by the line of third generation therapies “acceptance and commitment”, the subjective definition of self-worth would be determined by how close I am to being the person I want to be.
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PQEB: What is self-concept?
Dr. LAURA: It refers to the way a person perceives their behavior, abilities and characteristics. unique to generate evaluations about oneself. For example, beliefs such as: “I am a good friend” or “I am a kind person” are part of a general self-concept.
Self-concept tends to change during youth, a time when people go through their formation and identity process. As we grow this concept becomes more stable and detailed.
Within this construction, based on the beliefs that we adopt throughout our lives, we build the self-concept that will be the definition we have about who we are and how we connect with the world.
PQEB: Is it possible to strengthen them?
Dr. LAURA: Yes, self-worth can be strengthened through the daily actions we take, bringing us closer to what is truly valuable to us.
When life focuses on the why? Through experiences we turn off autopilot and allow ourselves to get closer to being the person we really want to be.
PQEB: What can affect self-worth?
Dr. LAURA: What affects it is “perception”, the thinking that others can recognize the world in the same way as we know it. Here the beliefs of the world are linked again, If, for example, we consider that a person only achieves success when they complete a doctorate, we will spend our lives feeling that our value is diminished because we have not reached where the collective tells us we should go.
PQEB: Can a partner affect one’s perception of self-worth?
Dr. LAURA: In the end, it is not the partner who affects you, it is your own construction of beliefs associated with the fact that a partner can modify what is valuable to you. The couple in Latin means “a set of two who have some relationship with each other”, that is, the couple is not just romantic love, it is a connection of two or more people within a social circle.
In this sense, the people with whom you generate a connection can influence your beliefs and self-perception.
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PQEB: How can having a negative self-concept affect you?
Dr. LAURA: When our construction of the world is based on specific people, situations, areas, it can be difficult to find meaning in life. Having a self-concept based on third parties places us in the great difficulty of living a life as if it were “borrowed”, since it limits us from acting on what is really important.the person who says: “I am nothing without my partner” or who indicates: “I am what I am because I have an important position” only shows how their self-concept has focused on only one area of life and how the day they lose this couple or you have to retire from work, you will not have an additional construction of the rest of the world.
We do not talk about positive or negative because there is no good or bad self-concept, this is the perception of those who live it, but it is essential to anchor this self-concept to all the dimensions of the being to not allow others to choose the direction in which we are going.