Over time, many authors have tried to give a rational explanation to one of humanity’s most complex feelings: love. One of the best-known positions is the triangular theory of love, proposed by the American psychologist Robert Sternberg in 1986 and which maintains that love is understood through three essential components: intimacy, passion and commitment.
Each of these components acts to manifest different aspects and types of love. In this Psychology-Online article we will delve deeper into what is fatuous love according to Sternberg and the foundations of the triangular theory of love, as well as some examples that will help you understand this topic a little more.
What is fatuous love
Sternberg defines fatuous love as a type of immature love that It is based mainly on physical attractiveness. Also, it explains that an individual can experience this type of love at different times, not just with the same person. In any case, he describes it as a feeling similar to falling in love.
In other words, fatuous love, also called crazy love, does not involve emotional commitment, but rather passion-motivated idealization, in which the person is treated as if they were perfect without the long-term commitment. It is a trivial love, which has no depth or substance, since what exists is a “whim” with respect to a couple or romance.
Likewise, it is characterized by the presence of exaggerated illusions, which explains the person’s lack of real-world experience or mature judgment. That is, there is no stability and closeness derived from the intimacy that arises throughout true love stories.
If you want to know how to stop idealizing all your relationships, you can consult.
Fundamentals of Sternberg’s triangular theory of love
Sternberg’s triangular theory of love is based on the interaction of three essential elements that come together to form different types of love between couples. Furthermore, each component manifests a different aspect of love. These theoretical foundations are:
- Intimacy: is the bond or closeness that each member of the couple feels for the other. When there is a lot of intimacy, appreciation, commitment and understanding grow. Therefore, the older you are, the warmer the relationship will be, which will tend to be long-lasting and stable.
- Passion: refers to physical attraction, romanticism and the desire for sexual intimacy. It includes the sources of sexual motivation and arousal that couples experience in a relationship.
- Commitment or decision: it is a decision at a cognitive level to love another person and to stay attached to a relationship of one’s own free will. It includes the willingness to love long-term without being committed or to commit to a relationship without acknowledging that you love the other person. Therefore, it is a fully conscious decision.
Types of love according to Sternberg
In addition to fatuous love, Sternberg recognizes in his theory that there are at least seven types of love, each of them with their own characteristics. These forms of love are understood jointly or as isolated entities and are the following:
The no love
This type of love is the one that occurs in casual relationships and that it does not imply any of the components of couple interrelationships, but it is evident daily in the social interaction of human beings. And this makes sense, since people do not express any type of love in the brief encounters that occur throughout their lives.
Affection
Affection is an expression of true and non-trivial love, in which intimacy is present. Therefore, it implies closeness and trust, however, it moves away from conscious commitment. It has to do with warmth, closeness and togetherness in the broadest sense of friendship.
Obsession or whim
Obsession or caprice is a type of love in which there is a lot of passion, but an absence of commitment and intimacy. It’s a love that happens at first sightwhich is why Sternberg associates it with the first stages of falling in love.
empty love
Empty love is the fourth type of love that Sternberg proposes in his theory and has to do with the commitment, but without passion and intimacy. For this reason, it is a love that is related to couples who have been together for many years and who decide to stay together without sexual attraction or a bond beyond commitment.
romantic love
Romantic love involves a lot of passion and intimacyHowever, it lacks commitment. This type of love appears when there is an interest in another person, with the addition of passion and sexual attraction.
Companion love
Also known as sociable love, companionate love is a type of friendship with long-term responsibility in which commitment and intimacy are present, but without passion or sexual attraction. That is, they are relationships in which the spark and sexual desire are lost and the decision to keep together prevails.
consummate love
Finally, Sternberg defines consummate love as one in which all three components are present in the relationship. For example, the love between father and son or couples who marry for true love, among other cases. It is a love that is difficult to achieve and that, once achieved, can end if the three components are not maintained.
Examples of fatuous love
Fatuous love is characterized by being ephemeral and fleeting. This type of entails feelings of intense passion, attraction, adoration and attachment that are not mutual. Thus, while in normal relationships love grows as the couple spends more time together, the same does not happen in fatuous love.
Some examples of fatuous love are:
- A whirlwind courtship or marriage: in which the commitment is motivated largely by passion, without the stabilizing influence of intimacy.
- Romeo and Juliet in William Shakespeare’s novel: in which young people met and immediately fell intensely in love.
- A relationship that occurs during a trip: whose correspondence is limited to the existence of casual encounters for the duration of the stay.
- Relationships as business proposals: in which economic or power interests are involved, without commitment or intimacy. It is a relationship that resembles a business partnership.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to What is fatuous love according to Sternberg?we recommend that you enter our category.
Bibliography
- Myers, E (2022, January 31). Sternberg’s triangular theory and the 8 types of love. Simply Psychology. www.simplypsychology.org/types-of-love-we-experience.html
- Sternberg, RJ (1988) The Triangle of Love: Intimacy, Passion, Commitment, Basic Books (ISBN 0465087469)…the:triangulus amoris.
- Sternberg, R.J., & Grajek, S. (1984). The nature of love. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 47, 312–329.
- Sternberg, R.J., & Barnes, M. (1985). Other realities and ideals in romantic relationships: four is a crowd? Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 49, 1586–1608.