Sexuality is a subject that innately arouses our curiosity. Not only because it is a natural and necessary practice as living beings, but also because throughout history it has been impregnated with judgments and labels that have ended up condemning it to the prohibited, the taboo.
In this article we will review what we understand by sexuality, why keeping it in the shade has been functional up to now, and how important it is to unlearn those beliefs that limit its practice and expression in a healthy way.
In this episode Enric reflects on the benefits of learning to integrate the shadow to create a balanced and fulfilling life.
In this video, David Corbera deals with the most common conflicts related to sexuality, proposing resources to be able to experience it in a more conscious, balanced and healthy way.
If you want to know more about the la method and how to apply it in your life to increase your emotional well-being, follow our social networks: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and Youtube.
What is sexuality?
Let’s stop for a moment to reflect on our most organic, biological and objective origin, the one that is measurable, verifiable and tangible.
Each of us comes from the culmination of a sexual relationship between two people. Nevertheless, What bodily sensation do we experience if, for a moment, we visualize the scene in which the phenomenon of our existence arose?
In most cases it will trigger a feeling of rejection, revulsion or perhaps we will classify it as perverted, unnatural or unpleasant. On many occasions, the simple fact of Talking about sex or is cause for embarrassment, surprise, anger and even censorship.
Sexuality, a biological necessity
It seems that sexuality belongs to the realm of intimacy and should not be shared. That must stay in the shadein the home of each person, in the unconscious of the individual.
Nevertheless, a living being is defined by its ability to grow, feed and reproduce, being a basic and common pillar to all beings that inhabit the earth. Then, Why isn’t the biological need for reproduction addressed in as natural a way as feeding or growth?
We cannot really live in the present until we become aware of the beliefs and experiences of the past that condition our way of perceiving and interpreting what happens to us.
Limiting beliefs related to sexuality
shame and guilt
we see how in mythology that predominates in our social unconscious, the Judeo-Christian, since sexuality is contemplated as the first of the shames.
Upon being expelled from paradise, Adam and Eve became aware of their nakedness and immediately covered themselves, hiding their sexuality, considering it sinful.
Being ashamed of their sexuality was, archetypically, the first consequence of original sin. It is easy to guess the symbolism of this reflex act in today’s society.
At the same time, Being naked, facing each other, without guilt, without shame, is a way of returning to our most original nature, visit that paradise from which they convinced us that we were expelled.
Social inhibition of sexuality
We all know limitations about sexuality, “It can only be enjoyed when accompanied by love”, “It should only be used as a means to reproduce ourselves”, “who does it a lot is such a thing…”, “Whoever does it little is something else…”.
Not so many years ago, schools warned children that if they masturbated, they could go blind, hair would grow on their hands, or even offend God himself.
“Sexuality is part of our behavior, it is one more element of our freedom. (…) Sex is not fatal, no; it is a possibility of creative life”.
Michel Foucault
We cannot ignore that All these guidelines are part of the and that, as such, we can see it reflected in a multitude of behaviors at an educational, social, and even political or legal level.
As a result of this reflection, several questions arise:
Why has it been so important to suppress this human facet in the society in which we live?
What does sexuality contain that makes it so present, so powerful and so feared at the same time?
Consequences of sexual repression
Affective, social and sexual development
The development of the adult occurs in adolescence at the same time as the differentiation of the individual with respect to the .
We could then infer that the Sexuality is associated with the process of individuation of the person. Therefore, sexual development is closely linked to affective and social growth and development.
In addition, it is the quintessential human alchemical process, the means by which two become one, duality coming together in unity.
Sexuality collects our most genuine biological survival instinct and, on the other hand, our purest spiritual aspiration for transcendence.
polarities in sexuality
Unfortunately, the more repression, the more trials are used on what is repressed.
It is easy to identify how we compensate our repression with the projective mechanism of . How, on many occasions, those who define themselves from the most absolute puritanism, are the ones who most criticize the sexual behavior of others and, at the same time, those who feel the most that they should .
This tremendous repression feeds two On the one hand, we live in a society that promotes an increasingly artificial sexuality, in which the pornographic industry is one of the most powerful in the world.
At the same time, one of the most punitive societies and with the greatest judgment towards sex in which, paradoxically, acts of extreme violence deserve less censorship than the simple exposure of a breast.
To illustrate this disproportion, it is convenient to mention that in many parts of the world it is a crime to breastfeed a baby in a public place. up to that point we make the natural taboo and the most immaculate nature is censored.
Sexuality as taboo and its consequences
It is precisely this lack of integration of sexuality which manifests itself in hypersexualizationwhich would be the opposite polarity of the chastityboth excessive behaviors but with the same common thread.
Taboo fosters deficient sexual educationwhich leads to a very high percentage of unwanted, abuse and even STDs.
This same taboo makes it more difficult for someone to express or share dysfunctions of a sexual nature and, therefore, to overcome them. The conflict itself is united with the creating a snowball that aggravates the situation.
Social stigma and sexual repression
You cannot politicize a psychological fact or psychologize a political factIn other words, we cannot justify political acts based on their psychological implication, but neither can we justify psychological behaviors based on their political context. However, we can see how one has inevitably influenced the other when we talk about sexuality.
Faucault expounded in his “history of sexuality” how through it a social hierarchy had even been established in which there were more or less “adequate” people according to their sexual orientation, their tastes, their affiliations, etc. Definitely, categorizing the worth of one person or another depending on their sexual habits.
The world of sex is punished and stigmatized, consequently causing mafias to be generated that control from the shadow and that, what could be one more regulated service, becomes a nest of violence, insecurity and cruelty.
“Sex only has limits for the one who puts them on and a purpose for the one who imposes it”
Valerie Tasso
The benefits of integrating sexuality
Sexuality as part of our personal development
Precisely, all these qualities have made sexuality a reserve of our shadow. Sexuality has become a part of our being that should not be shown and therefore one through which we can get to know each other better.
The only way to experience inappropriate sexuality is to use it without respect for yourself or others, to do what you don’t want to please, to live it as an obligation or as a means of acceptance or recognition.
Sexuality was created to be enjoyed. Let’s do it with the security and calm of those who know they are developing one of the most powerful facets of your being.
Develop full sexuality through Bioneuroemoción®
Sexuality is the means through which the human being can bonding intimately with oneself and with others. It is a space that requires the capacity to deliver and surrender the defense barriers.
And to surrender with confidence and allow yourself enjoyment, it is necessary that there is .
The method of proposes tools to be able to challenge any that prevents us from living our sexuality with joy, peace and enjoyment. The it is what enables not only individual change, but also what enables cultural change.
Do you dare to discover what limits you to allow you to enjoy your sexuality and live a full life?
Share in the comments if you found this article interesting and share it with whoever you think might find this information useful. Thanks for your interest!