In relationships, mostly, all our insecurities, emotions, shortcomings, etc. come to the surface… That is when we can consciously work on them with someone who gives us confidence, such as our partner. We must know that what bothers us about our partner (and in all our personal relationships) are emotions, beliefs and/or thoughts that we must work on ourselves or from which we must learn something. And what does that mean? That the fact that your partner is bothered by you going out partying, for example, represents that there are some issues that need to be resolved to be calmer and more confident.
Currently, nightlife, and more so in the young population, is part of our daily lives, which is why we have to deal with and work on the thoughts and emotions that awaken in us when this happens. In this Psychology-Online article we will explain Why it bothers us when our partner goes out to party and what to do about it.
Why does it bother you when your partner goes out to party?
Many times our mind panics when faced with a situation such as your partner going out to a party since we can feel insecure due to the presence of many specific stimuli, such as alcohol, other people, music, dancing, etc., and we must analyze more deeply what emotions arise in us at that moment.
It is useful to know how to differentiate if what you feel is sadness, fear, distrust, anger, jealousy, blockage or indifference, For example. Each one represents a lack that must be worked from a different point than the rest. Reflect on whether this event happens to more people around you or only with your partner. If it only happens to you with your partner, it is advisable that you analyze when it happens to you, for what reasons you think it happens to you, what emotions you feel at that moment and that you can have a conversation with him/her or with a trusted person. Once you analyze the reasons for the conflict with this situation and talk about it openly with someone you trust, you can deeply analyze whether the beliefs, ideas or thoughts you have about it are real and/or if you want to continue experiencing them.
The fact that you are upset that your partner can go to have fun or attend a festive atmosphere may have its roots in:
- Lack of trust in oneself.
- Fear to the loss.
- Attachment.
- Jealousy. In this article we explain.
- Unsafety.
- Distrust of their behaviors both with yourself and/or with other people.
Why your partner doesn’t want to party with you
In this situation it is important to know the reason why he does not want to go out partying with you. Your partner may like to share many other situations and experiences with you, but the fact that going out partying want to share it with your friends and/or work colleagues, for example, and should not be a cause of conflict. In a couple, interacting with your circle of friends outside the couple is very beneficial as it brings happiness, disconnection and other enriching experiences.
But, if this issue worries you, communication with your partner is vital to clarify your doubts since only he/she will be able to resolve them for you.
What to do when your partner tells you he’s going out to party?
What can you do when your partner wants to go out partying or when he tells you that he doesn’t want you to go out partying?
- In both cases we must maintain a sincere and healthy conversationas we mentioned above.
- and when we feel discomfort or pain with certain situations we must be able to talk about it openly with him/her.
- Whether you are the person who doesn’t want your partner to go out partying or if she is the one who doesn’t want you to go out, you should ask why of this denial. For what reason do you not want or want this to happen? What bothers you, annoys or hurts you?
- As adults that we are, we must be able to recognize our emotions, feel them and try to work with them to heal and improve them. In this article we explain strategies, techniques and examples of .
- If what you are experiencing is jealousy, you may need to work on your own self-esteem and trust towards the other person. Here you will find .
- If you feel jealous and also believe that your partner may be unfaithful or may act in ways that you do not like, you should communicate and evaluate between the two how to work it.
- If, on the other hand, it is your partner who refuses you to go out partying, you should talk to him/her and empathize with the emotions you may be feeling. It is important that your partner understands that you are open to listening to him/her and trying to understand his/her thoughts.
- Jealousy is born from insecurities regarding past experiences and/or present or future events that cause us concern. In this article you can see for overcome insecurity.
- Communication must be sincere and healthy on both sides since the purpose of this is to be able to find the reasons, work on them and build greater trust in the relationship.
- If your partner is not prepared to have this conversation or does not feel safe or interested in analyzing the reasons that lead him or her to make these decisions, then it is you who should act according to your values. No person can exercise the power to decide your actions and/or thoughts and you should not give this power to your partner. Each individual is capable of making his own decisions and is free to act as he feels he should act.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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