Relationships tend to be related to connection and emotional support, in addition to the understanding of other areas of the lives of both people. What happens when one of the two ignores the other? What does it mean when your partner sees you cry and does nothing?
It can be a serious matter, since this involves inattention and lack of emotional support by omission or even passive-aggressive behavior on the part of the person who ignores it. At the same time, it could simply be someone who does not have the emotional intelligence that allows them to act in these types of circumstances. In this Psychology-Online article, we answer the following question: My partner sees me cry and does nothing, is this normal?
Why doesn’t my partner comfort me when I cry?
The usual thing is that the person reacts to someone else’s crying, even more so if it is someone with whom they have a close emotional relationship. This denotes empathy and concern for the well-being of their peers. When it is specifically an emotional partner who rarely responds to alarms such as crying, it is certainly something striking.
So why doesn’t my partner comfort me when I cry? Understanding that relationships have emotional support as one of their pillars, it is natural that you may find it suspicious that your partner does not show empathy or interest in actions that represent emotional discomfort. The reason why he/she does not respond, actively or immediately, may have different origins. We will tell you some possible reasons why my partner does not comfort me when I cry:
- Shortage of emotional tools: This translates to the fact that the person does not have skills that allow them to react as expected in emotional situations. Therefore, they intentionally avoid these situations, react in unusual ways, or simply become paralyzed by it.
- Lack of empathy: This is a characteristic generally presented in sociopaths, although there are those who possess it without the need to qualify as clinical cases. A person with low emotional responsiveness usually lacks empathy for his or her peers. This limits your fields of action in this regard, since it is an intrinsic condition. In these cases, we recommend the following article:
- Passive-aggressive behavior: consists of passively attacking, generally indirectly, the other person. Ignoring someone is a common practice in this type of behavior. Find out more about him.
- Lack of compromise: If we talk about a relationship, the presence of consummated love is assumed. Taking into account Sternberg’s definition of love1: consummate love is described as the presence of intimacy, passion and commitment. Thus, the lack of commitment means that one is not acting as expected in the role of emotional support.
Is it normal for my partner to see me crying and do nothing?
My partner sees me cry and does nothing, is this normal? In general terms, it is important to identify if this act of omission is presented exclusively towards you or if it also includes other people with close interpersonal relationships. The intention is for you to be able to define if it is something intentionally directed towards you. However, ignoring a partner’s crying can be considered a indicator of emotional distress on the person, since it goes against the support and commitment of an established relationship.
It is about internal conflicts or, the truth is that there is a matter to attend to on the part of both of us. If you come to deal with deliberate actions with passive-aggressive intent, the need to clarify the panorama becomes greater. That is why it is suggested to take into account whether this person acts in other ways to resolve the conflict.
I feel like my partner doesn’t love me
Continuing with what was previously proposed, it is possible that your partner does love you and reacts when he sees you cry, only does it in a different way as expected, in accordance with their emotional tools. According to Gary Chapman2, displays of affection vary from person to person, depending on their way of understanding and interpreting affection.
Therefore, it is prudent that you make sure what the reality is between you and your partner before stating that he loves you or that he does not. Likewise, it is also essential that Identify if there are traits of passive aggressiveness on your partner and how likely it is that he or she is exercising these techniques on you. In this article, we tell you.
Finally, if you have already been able to identify that there is a crack in the relationship, the best thing to do is visit a psychologist or couples therapist to support you in resolving this situation.
What to do if my partner passes on me
What to do if my partner ignores me? If you notice that there has been a distance between you and your partner lately, you may think that he pays less attention to you than he should. In this article, we tell you. Here are some tips for these situations:
- try identify the origin or cause of his behavior.
- Talk to your partner: Sometimes you may feel that your partner pays little attention to you, but in reality something is happening to him and he doesn’t know how to manage it.
- If you’ve tried to fix things, but your partner continues to react, it’s important that the lack of attention doesn’t turn into disrespect.
- give him space if necessary and focus on yourself.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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References
- Sternberg, R. (1988). The love triangle. Intimacy, passion and commitment. Paidós. Iberian.
- Chapman, G. (1995). The five languages of love. Colombia. Unilit.