As we know, adolescence is a difficult life stage because a series of physical and psychological changes are generated in the person where the period of childhood ends and the stage of puberty begins to later reach adulthood. Because this is a delicate stage, as parents and/or people close to the adolescent, they must know how to guide and support them in the appropriate way so that they can go through this period with fewer problems. But how can we help a teenager with low self-esteem?
Both at home and at school and in any other environment where there is a lot of contact with the adolescent, a series of guidelines can be followed to help increase their self-esteem. In this Psychology-Online article, we will give you a series of tips so that you can know how to help a teenager with low self-esteem and what should never be done.
Parents and people in authority for adolescents, even without knowing it, contribute daily to the development of their self-esteem through their words and actions. It is important to be aware of what is being instilled in adolescents every day to recognize if it is truly something positive and if it is not, do something to improve it.
Get used to praising him
It is important to praise teenagers for their achievements, no matter how small they may be. However, they should not only be praised for their achievements, but also for your effort and dedication since in many cases this is not recognized. It is necessary to convey to them the importance of trying and fighting for their goals, explaining to them that it is not bad to fail, but quite the opposite.
One has to avoid focusing on the negative When you do not achieve the results you want, you must teach him to always look at learning from each mistake and then do better. All of this will help the adolescent feel accepted and valued, which will contribute to better accepting and valuing himself.
It is necessary to take into account that praise should not be exaggerated and they have to be sincere because otherwise they will be counterproductive, especially in people with low self-esteem. To do this you have to be accurate in the moments in which they are going to be given and be realistic. For example, flattering him by telling him that he is the best in the world, that he is the most intelligent of all, etc. Apart from the fact that he is not sincere, it will cause him to develop an exaggerated ego and in the short or long term he will have problems in his relationship with others, leading him to further deteriorate his self-esteem.
Set rules and limits
It is necessary to know that establishing rules and limits, especially at home and at school, is essential for the good development of self-esteem. When there are clear rules and limits that they know must be respected and followed, they learn to develop a sense of responsibility assuming the consequences of their actions when they do not comply.
To achieve this, it is important that the rules and limits imposed are firm and clear, avoiding ambivalence. For example, if at home the mother says that she can watch television until certain hours of the night and the father does not respect that rule and lets his son watch it whenever he wants, it can cause confusion in the young person. and the message is conveyed to him that he can transgress the rules whenever he wants. It is necessary that both parents agree on what the limits and rules will be at home and that they comply with them to the letter.
Give constructive criticism
Many times the mistake is made of criticizing teenagers in an unconstructive way, thinking that this will cause them to do better later. When negative criticism is given to a teenager, especially if they have low self-esteem, it only increases their problem. For example, it is not the same to say: “You did very poorly on your English exam, you have many grammatical errors, how bad you are with languages”, as it is to say: “I notice that you did not do very well on your written exam, however. In oral you have done much better, with a little more effort you will be able to obtain the results you want.”
Encourage you to do what you are passionate about
All of us have hobbies and activities that we like to do in which we feel comfortable and at ease because we enjoy it too much. Promoting carrying out these types of activities is essential to know how to help a teenager with low self-esteem. When the adolescent feels supported and accepted, noticing that his likes and interests are also important to his parents and/or adults close to him, he will feel more capable and with greater self-confidence.
Allowing him to carry out the activities that he likes so much will help him develop new skills, will improve your self-acceptanceyou will increase your creativity as well as your chances of being successful doing what you are passionate about and developing your own identity, thereby increasing your self-esteem.
Dedicate time
On many occasions, when children become teenagers, parents forget to spend quality time with them. Although many parents, due to their work and multiple occupations, do not have much time for their children, we must remember that more than quantity, the time must be quality.
So it is better to spend 1 hour with your children where all your attention is focused on them, than to spend 3 hours being with them but also watching television, being on your cell phone, paying attention to other things, etc. All of this will also promote unity and good family coexistence, which is very important to increase the self-esteem of adolescents.
Exercise alone is a great tool to increase emotional and psychological well-being since when doing it our brain secretes some chemical substances such as serotonin and endorphinswhich regulate our mood and increase our well-being and personal satisfaction.
Playing team sports also helps increase self-esteem since promotes camaraderie and in this way social relationships are also increased. The teenager has the opportunity to make new friends and they usually have more affinity with him since they share things in common such as the same sport.
Seek help from a professional
It must always be taken into account that if the adolescent has extremely low self-esteem, has problems in one or more areas of his life and is too negative, it is advisable that he receive help from a professional. The ideal thing is to start a psychological therapy as soon as possible where you will learn to develop self-love and self-confidence so that you can also achieve your life goals and purposes.
In this other article we discover how.