He writes to me but DOESN’T WANT TO STAY with me, why? – The 7 REASONS

You talk all day, it seems like the conversation never ends. The next day I came back again. There is a good vibe, you notice feeling between the two of you, you would like to go further and see how things go without the screen in the middle, if there is the same chemistry or not. There is only one problem and that is that you don’t see that the other person wants to take the step to meet you. When the topic came up, she told you that later and, even though you like talking to that person, it is starting to be a bit difficult for you to continue down that path. You need to see the person once and for all and not continue with that telematic relationship. At Psychology-Online we want to explain what may be happening for this person I write to you but I don’t want to stay with you.

There are more extroverted people and others more introverted, the latter sometimes may have more difficulty taking the next step in a relationship. It may happen that the person feels very comfortable talking to you and really likes you, otherwise they would not talk to you so often. Even so, if you have been talking for a while, I should feel like to take one more step. It is normal that at first there are people who find it more difficult to ask for a face-to-face appointment, but after a while they should want to stay and dare to take a closer look at the person behind the screen.

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If he doesn’t want to meet, why does he talk to you constantly? It seems strange and this is why it is a common question to which we are going to answer. Below, we see a list of causes that may be causing the other person not to take another step:

1. Low self-esteem

Low self-esteem leads insecurities and that can have an impact on social life and, obviously, when it comes to meeting someone. The fear of criticism or of not meeting the expectations expected by the other person causes them to create difficulties and impediments when it comes to meeting you. In this article you can see the.

2. Introversion

The introverted person is very thoughtful and tends to be more sociable with people they know well, which is why they will invest a lot of time in getting to know you before taking a step like meeting up. Their comfort zone involves first knowing more things about you to later feel more comfortable when facing a face-to-face date. If you want to be able to identify this type of personality, here you will find all the.

3. Fear

He is an emotion that can often be paralyzing. There are people who, due to various situations, facing a date can cause them some fear and they prefer to have long conversations but not face to face.

4. Physical complex

The physical complex is related to self-esteem, despite this, it is something peculiar, there are people whose physical appearance causes them great insecurity but they know that their conversation is very interesting and they can contribute great things to the other person. Even so, today we live in a society where physical appearance continues to play a very important role when it comes to meeting someone or not. This fact can make the person try until the last moment to be calling your attention for what it is, that way, when I stay with you, the physical will no longer play that first role. If you think this may be what is holding the other person back, emphasize that for you physical appearance is not the most important thing about a person.

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5. Shyness

Unlike introversion, where the person interacts only with those people he knows well, the shy person presents nerves before any social event, regardless of whether you know them or not. Perhaps the shy person feels more comfortable talking to you behind a screen and the mere fact of thinking that he has to meet, causes him certain anxiety.

6. Negative experiences

On our backs we all carry a backpack of experiences, some positive, others not so much. It may happen that if we have had some bad experiences in love affairs, they weigh us down too much and stop us from taking another step towards knowing someone, for example. fear of adding another negative experience more and being unable to see that perhaps it doesn’t have to be negative and can be positive. If you think that this may be the reason why the person does not dare to take the step, it is important to validate how they may feel and even give examples of yourself.

  • Example: “The truth is that on some occasions I have also been hurt in this matter, I have gotten excited and then nothing. I understand perfectly how you must be feeling.”

7. He is with someone else

It may be that he finds you a very interesting person but his current situation, which he may not have told you about, is that he already has someone in his life and is simply looking for something in you. Passing fun to meet certain needs in the relationship.

When someone confuses us, we must take the reins to clarify the situation. To do this, below we are going to see what we can do when a person we feel is confusing us.

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Take the initiative

You’ve been talking for too long now not to meet. Forward! you propose it. Maybe all her insecurities disappear when he sees that you also want to take a step further and he or she didn’t dare to tell you.

What do you think about me?

Perhaps it may seem that this question is not very consistent with why you don’t see each other, but it is true that before taking a step like meeting up, it may be okay. know what your opinion is the other person about you. Furthermore, based on the response we can intuit whether the person wants to take a step further or not.

Why don’t we meet?

The most direct question of all, but it will resolve any doubts on the subject and will allow us make a decision about the continuity or not of the conversations with the person.