Childhood is a stage in which boys and girls absorb all experiences like sponges, whether positive or negative. In fact, it is in childhood when part of the personality that will characterize each human being is molded throughout their existence. Therefore, if emotional wounds form in childhood that do not heal in time, individual emotional development will be affected.
In this Psychology-online article, we will explain What are they the emotional wounds of childhood and how to heal them. We will help you by identifying each one of them so that you can overcome them and not continue dragging them into your adult life.
What are childhood wounds?
The emotional wounds of childhood are negative and traumatic experiences that occur during the early stage of a person’s life and have a significant impact on their emotional and mental well-being throughout their development. These wounds can be caused by various factors, such as emotional or physical abuse, abandonment, neglect, loss of a loved one, bullying, excessive pressure, among others.
During childhood, boys and girls are particularly vulnerable and are in the process of physical, cognitive and emotional development. For this reason, the negative experiences they face can leave deep emotional scars and affect the way they see the world, as well as how they relate to others and how they feel about themselves.
On the other hand, these childhood wounds can manifest in various ways in adult life, such as difficulties establishing healthy relationships, insecurity, anxiety, depression, self-destructive behaviors, trust problems and dysfunctional behavioral patterns. But what are the 7 childhood wounds? We show them to you below.
The fear of abandonment
When fathers, mothers or caregivers do not want or cannot fulfill their protective role well, infants develop an irrational fear of abandonment, which is also known as . This is one of the main wounds of childhood and people who experience it grow up with a latent fear that they will always be abandoned again.
This emotional wound usually forms between 0 and 3 years old. The most common causes are parents who are absent or physically present, but who put up an emotional and communicative barrier with the infant. This lack of company leaves a deep mark that manifests itself with the inability to establish stable relationships in the future and with a deep feeling of loneliness which is persistent into adulthood.
The fear of rejection
If we talk about emotional wounds from childhood, the fear of rejection is one of the most common. It can arise from conception, especially when it comes to unwanted pregnancies, and occurs as a result of the feeling of non-acceptance. when one of the caregivers expresses rejection towards the infant.
It generally has to do with situations such as postpartum depression, one of the parents abandoning the baby, school or family bullying, among others. This leads to a feeling of insecurity that makes it difficult to develop healthy relationships throughout life.
If you want to know how to heal this wound, in this article you will find information about .
Domestic violence
When the family environment is violent on a physical or psychological level, the boy or girl tends to become emotionally destabilized and present. Therefore, hitting, mistreatment and scolding should not be associated with mandatory disciplinary measures for child training.
Childhood wounds like this mark adult life because children who grow up in violent homes are more likely to have anger control problems and tend to repeat this abusive model when they are older.
Contempt for others
Infants who grow up under constant submission to contempt, humiliation or bullying experience trauma and emotional wounds that are difficult to heal. This directly impacts their self-esteem and also generates constant anxiety disorders.
As a consequence of this type of trauma, children will develop a behavior of permanent contempt and will think that everyone wants to cause them harm and humiliate them.
The fear of the unknown
Fear of the unknown is another of the main wounds of childhood. It is normal for boys and girls to express fear of the dark, of ghosts, among other things normal at that age. The detail is that if adults do not help them assertively face these fears, they can become people with a lack of empathy and traits of indifference to the problems of others when they reach adulthood.
In this article you will see what the .
The feeling of inadequacy
When a caregiver shows love and affection, he/she transmits tranquility and emotional security to his/her child. On the contrary, if her attitude is hostile or demonstrated, the infant develops a personal insufficiency complex that will affect him throughout his life.
This is one of the childhood wounds that causes children to feel ignored. That causes assimilate into their mental schemes that it is not good enough so that they love them. Therefore, they grow up with low self-esteem and a very low sense of self-love.
Betrayals and problems in personal boundaries
Personal betrayals are one of the hardest childhood wounds. Sometimes, it is common for parents to think that children are not affected by broken promises. The fact is that a constant lack of honesty, destroys trust In the kids.
For example, if they are told that when they finish eating the vegetables they will take them to the park and that is not true, frustration will fill their emotions as they see their expectations destroyed. Therefore, another childhood emotional wound is breaking promises because little ones They grow up with the idea that it is not safe to believe in anyone.
How to heal emotional wounds from childhood
Being parents does not come with a manual, however, when there is love, anything is possible. The first step to healing childhood wounds is go deeper inside to identify if your inner child feels hurt and the possible cause. By understanding them you will become someone who is in control and you will begin a therapeutic process to move forward.
The most advisable thing in these cases is to seek professional help to help you identify the repetitive patterns that you have experienced since childhood, such as psychologists or therapists. In this sense, a psychologist can help you explore and understand past experiences, process repressed emotions, and learn strategies to deal with emotional and relational difficulties in adult life.
Start with small steps, prioritize your self-carebe patient and remember that only you have the power to choose how you want to live your life.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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Bibliography
- Eysenck, H. (1970). Biological bases of personality. Barcelona. Fontanella.
- Church, VI (2019, January 31). How to heal the wounded inner child. https://www.psicologiayconsciencia.com/nino-interior/