When it seemed that you were already beginning to understand what ghosting was, what stalking someone was, now another new term appears called orbiting. It seems that this relationship thing, since social networks appeared, has become increasingly more complicated and new terms and behaviors that were not practiced in other times continue to constantly appear.
But networks are already part of our daily lives, to the point that they have caused changes in the way we relate to and meet new people. Before, when you stopped liking someone you’d been knowing for a while, you’d simply tell them and/or stop seeing each other. But now, with networks, that contact can still exist. Therefore, in this Psychology-Online article we explain What is orbiting, the signs to identify it and how to act in front of it. Keep reading!
What is orbiting?
Orbiting is a behavior that occurs when a relationship between two people ends. There stops being explicit interaction, you stop seeing each other and talking, but There are still interactions on social networkslike watching Instagram stories, liking posts, and even sharing your content on their stories or with their friends and commenting on your posts, but without engaging in a conversation with you.
Summarizing what orbiting is: it is one of the types of ghosting through social networks, the practice of which appears identical, but is characterized because, in addition to the interruption of communication, there is still connection through online platforms. That is, when they ghost you and come back; The contact of a romantic or friendship relationship ends without explanation and ignoring any communication. And suddenly you receive samples of interactions on Instagram.
Signs to identify orbiting
Termination of communication It can be both unexpected and gradual, and permanent or relative to a specific period of time (such as during holidays). We find different motivations that can lead a person to practice orbiting, among them we find that it is an easy way to cut off communication without involving great effort.
Some of the main signs that can help us identify could be:
- Face-to-face meetings decrease.
- Increase communication through networksby messages instead of direct communication.
- The other person remains distant, there is no feedback for his part but he does like your posts.
How to act when faced with orbiting
Orbiting is generally characterized by different statesspecifically 3 according to Williams (2009) which would be:
- Thoughtful. This stage occurs immediately after detection, and produces a rapid response characterized by social pain, a revaluation of basic psychological needs, and negative emotions.
- Reflective. This second stage occurs after people’s reflection, after they have been able to think about it and integrate the situation into their experience. In this state people begin to recover from the initial response.
- Resignation. Characterized by feelings of alienation and, in some cases, depression.
Therefore, after receiving orbiting behaviorsand during and/or after these stages, reactions characterized by:
- Surprise and confusion.
- Anger, sadness and guilt.
- Attempts to repair the relationship.
- Acceptance.
What to do if they orbit you
Some authors such as Freedman et al. (2019) maintain that strong beliefs in destiny on the part of orbiting victims would act as a protective factor to accept the communication cut-off and networked interaction, since they attribute the fact to the will of destiny.
If we suffer orbiting, it will be important to act, on the one hand, with personal self-care to be able to integrate the experience into our life history in a healthy way and without it affecting us excessively, being able to emerge “stronger” from the experience.
On the other hand, if we feel that it will help us, we can communicate to the other person how this situation makes us feel And even if their interaction with us on social networks bothers us a lot, delete it and/or block it in order to avoid the discomfort and negative emotions that it causes us.
How to avoid orbiting
In order to avoid future orbiting situations in future relationships, we can put on the table, as a condition within the relationship (of whatever type), the fact of communicating when we want to end it for any reason to the other person and being able to talk about it
Many times situations arise that make us uncomfortable due to lack of communication from the beginning. That’s why it’s important present our conditions when we start relationships.
If you liked this article about what orbiting is, signs to identify it and how to act; We recommend you read our post about and .
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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Bibliography
Pancani, L., Mazzoni, D., Aureli, N., & Riva, P. (2021). Ghosting and orbiting: An analysis of victims’ experiences. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 38(7), 1987–2007.