Egoism is a characteristic of behavior observable through the attitude that we often identify more clearly in others while we justify our own selfish behavior with excuses. The assessment of a person in whom this trait stands out significantly is not the result of specific behavior but rather frequent and even predictable.
Egoism is the attitude of those who live their reality from constant attention to the self. In this Psychology-Online article, we reflect on the meaning of selfish according to psychology.
What is selfishness according to psychology
The selfish person shows a different way of being than someone who adopts a lifestyle focused on generosity as a principle of existence. While for a generous person happiness is in giving and sharing, on the contrary, for a selfish person the goal is found in receive and satisfy your own needs. Without this meaning experiencing constant joy and satisfaction from this point of view, since the egoist falls into an individualism that distances him from others.
Selfishness is reinforced through ego and vanity. However, this ego offers a subjective, distorted and partial vision of reality.
4 characteristics of a selfish person
How to identify the traits of a person who has a selfish profile? Below, we show you 4 characteristics that will help us know the meaning of selfish according to psychology:
1. Attachment to material things
The egoist establishes an attachment relationship with things since it is difficult for him to let go of what he has. He lives longer focused on lack of what he lacks than in the gratitude of what he has. For this reason, one of the characteristics of the selfish mentality is wanting more.
2. Lack of empathy with others
There are aspects of life that depend mainly on oneself, however, there are also issues that must be negotiated with the other through agreements in the area of the couple, friendship, family or work. The selfish person has difficulty putting himself in the shoes of others, he expects others to give in and act exactly as he expects. As a consequence, he shows himself to others.
3. He does not ask but demands
One of the effects of it is that the person positions himself before others, giving more value and meaning to his needs than to those of others. This leads him to presuppose things, to demand as if he had the right to do so. For this same reason, he gets angry when others respond with a refusal to his own request.
4. Not generous with her time
Time has its own economy since although it is not a personal possession, the person does manage their minutes according to your own expectations. Selfishness also manifests itself in the unwillingness to invest time in an action that does not fully connect with the desire of that moment.
How to overcome selfishness? 5 tips
Although it is very comfortable for us to point out selfishness as an observable issue in the lives of others, we grow as people when we identify selfish behaviors in ourselves. Today’s society fosters individualism in many aspects. However, ending up locked in ourselves and in the enormous dimensions of our ego does not make us happier. How to limit selfishness in our lives?
1. Consequences of selfishness
Sometimes, you can become aware of the dimensions of this reality through its effects, that is, from the consequences that these behaviors produce in relationships in the form of loneliness, communication difficulties, arguments or distancing from others. .
But for assume the consequences of selfishness At the level of personal relationships, it is important that you assume your responsibility in the course of events and not only blame others for breaking your expectations.
2. Change of beliefs
Just because someone loves you doesn’t mean they have to constantly like you. Your friends and family also have their own difficulties, expectations, dreams, projects and hopes. Do not delegate your responsibility to anyone to take charge of what you can do for yourself.
3. Practical experience
Egoism gives you some experiences and gives you different ones. Experience, feel, observe and experience situations in which you position yourself before reality from that vision to discover the joy that is at the base of those moments.
- The altruist You discover that you receive more than you give share your life with others. Even if it takes an effort to make this change in approach, you can try it. The objective of limiting selfishness is also a learning process linked to those who become aware that growing up implies taking this view of reality. Life educates our ego through its own wisdom because it breaks our expectations in many moments.
4. Listen to others
When the closest circle of friends and family regularly bump into the ego of that person they love, at some point they ask him this question. dissatisfaction with that trait that they observe in so many moments. Therefore, if different people have mentioned information that reminds you of this topic, perhaps it would be advisable for you to try to pay attention to those words to analyze what is true in them. If you need more advice, we recommend reading here.
5. Love yourself better
The selfish person may believe that they love themselves very much by giving themselves so much importance, however, the reality is that the way they treat themselves does not positively reinforce their self-esteem. How to love yourself better by sharing your life with others from the perspective of seeking the common good.
Does that mean that selfishness can be reduced to zero to the point of never experiencing any such behavior in the future? By educating your ego you approach healthy selfishness to think about yourself without creating a wall between you and others.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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