Animals take care of their young when they are born to safeguard their survival and that of their own species. Human beings do exactly the same thing when taking care of our babies. The baby cannot eat if we do not provide it with food, it does not look for water or flee from possible dangers. He needs the supervision, surveillance and care of the adult to survive.
The baby or child then establishes early protective bonds with people (usually their parents), and this is what we call attachment. The way in which the necessary care is provided, their demands are met, etc. will result in the development of different types of attachment: secure or insecure. In the following Psychology-Online article we expose the insecure attachment: what it is, types and how to work on it.
What is insecure attachment
As we have anticipated in the introduction, the development of attachment is necessary for the baby to establish the first bonds.
The psychiatrist John Bowlby and the psychologist Mary Ainsworth they formulated For their studies, they used an experimental situation that they called a strange situation. In it, the child was left in a strange environment and the parents were absent on several occasions. The children’s reactions to such a situation were studied to formulate the theory, which distinguishes between secure attachment and insecure attachment.
Secure attachment shows the establishment of a parent-child relationship in which the child has learned that their caregivers will be available when they need them to meet their needs and unconditionally, which is why they love them and value them positively.
He insecure attachmenton the contrary, shows a type of attachment in which the child finds deficiencies regarding his or her care. In the strange situation, the child may react in an avoidant or ambivalent way.
Insecure attachment includes three types of attachment that we will see in the next section. It is important to emphasize following López Sánchez, F. (2009) that these are not mental pathologies, but rather behavior patterns in which there are difficulties and deficiencies in areas such as confidence or emotional life.
Finally, there is debate about whether attachment styles remain stable throughout life or change. Although it is true that there is no consensus, both positions have their defenders.
Types of insecure attachment
Insecure attachment can be divided into three types which will manifest themselves to different degrees in each case. To conceptualize each of the types we follow López Sánchez, F. (2009). We will look at the characteristics and signs of each one so you can know if your child has a secure or insecure attachment.
Insecure-avoidant attachment
In this type of attachment it is expected that the child will separate, as far as possible, from his parents. This is a situation in which the child has learned not to count on his attachment figuressince they will not attend to their needs, will not be accessible, will reject them emotionally or will not establish intimate relationships with them.
Among the characteristics that we can find in children with avoidant attachment are:
- They avoid emotional contact.
- Have difficulty expressing your emotions and understand those of others.
- They behave as if they didn’t care about others.
- They manifest difficulties in relationships.
- They do not seek comfort or support in painful situations but rather withdraw into themselves.
- They show and/or seek a certain autonomy.
Finally, in the strange situation they will not protest when their parents leave the room and they will be indifferent and/or avoidant before the reunion.
Ambivalent-resistant insecure attachment
Children with ambivalent attachment are children who show themselves. This is a situation in which parents:
- They have been able to show themselves in an inconsistent way with their children (for example, they can be tremendously demanding and tremendously permissive at the same time).
- They have been able to use emotional blackmail in their relationships with children.
- They can be unstable couples.
- They can be anxious people.
- They may express doubts or negative criticism about themselves to their children.
Among the characteristics of this attachment, in which the child may feel doubts and fear of being abandoned, we find:
- They are not convinced of the unconditionality of their attachment figures.
- They need approval and constant displays of affection.
- They need evidence of the availability or accessibility of the attachment figure.
- They continually monitor that the attachment figure is close and rarely separate from them.
- After the separation with the attachment figure and their subsequent reunion, they have fear of a new separation.
They present difficulties in separation during the strange situation. At the same time that they want to see the attachment figure, they do not show much willingness to contact and affection, which is why we speak of an ambivalent style.
Disorganized-disoriented insecure attachment
This last attachment style is proposed by Main and Solomon in 1986. It is a type of attachment in which the child shows anxiety and avoidanceso it becomes a mixture of the two previous types.
There are authors who question this last type of attachment due to the heterogeneity that the profiles classified here can show. However, there seem to be certain characteristics that define them, including:
- Tendency to display stereotyped behaviors.
- Sample of unexpected changes.
- Inappropriate and contradictory behavior.
- Difficulties in relationships with others.
This type can be caused by situations of abuse or situations of similar severity and that is why the child avoids establishing intimate relationships. As for emotions, these children are not able to control them, so they are overwhelmed by their unpleasant emotions.
Consequences of insecure attachment
As we have already pointed out, insecure attachment styles do not imply mental pathology. However, it may appear associated symptoms (such as high anxiety, irrational ideas or beliefs, etc.) that will appear in the case evaluation process and that must be treated with the corresponding techniques (relaxation techniques, cognitive restructuring, family therapy, etc.). Insecure attachment can be a source of pain and the difficulties mentioned regarding the part emotional and social.
How to work on insecure attachment
J. Bowlby in his work “A secure base. Clinical applications of an attachment theory” (Bowlby, J., 1989) offers a series of guidelines that the therapist should take into account in the individual therapy process. Let’s see how to work on insecure attachment in children and adults.
Bowlby indicates that the therapist must provide, within the framework of attachment theory, the conditions for that the patient explores the image of himself and his attachment figures and can reevaluate and restructure them with the help of the experiences lived within the framework of the therapeutic relationship itself. The therapist’s role is described in five main points:
- Provide a secure base to the patient.
- Help and guide the patient in exploring their relationships.
- Use the therapeutic relationship as a basis for the process.
- Connect present behavior with past experiences that could have originated them.
- Question the validity of the way you see yourselfothers, and relationships.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to Insecure attachment: what it is, types and how to work on itwe recommend that you enter our category.
References
- López Sánchez, F. (2009). Loves and heartbreaks. Madrid: New Library.
- Bowlby, J. (1989) A secure base. Clinical applications of an attachment theory. Barcelona: Paidós Editorial.
Bibliography
- Casullo, MM, Fernández Liporace, M. (2005). Evaluation of attachment styles in adults. Research Yearbook, 12, pp 183-192.