How to OVERCOME FEARS – the 10 keys!

Fear is a primary, basic and universal emotion. That means that it is present in the emotional repertoire of each and every one of us. So, is it for a reason? Evidently! Fear is a Defense mechanism in situations that pose danger.

If you wonder why you are afraid, you should know that this emotion has a clear survival function. It guides you towards the most appropriate reaction when something exists that poses a risk to you. In large part, our ancestors have survived thanks to fear. For example, when fear helped them run from a predator. Currently, fear is responsible for keeping you from walking on the highway or sitting on the railing of a tenth-floor balcony. In the following article you will find more information about .

This fear that is triggered by a real and present danger is called functional fear, since it is helping us. On the other hand, we find the dysfunctional fear, that fear that is not helping you. For example, he is not helping you because it means that you spend more time traveling or the fear of the new does not make your life easier either since it prevents you from taking advantage of opportunities and living new experiences.

The fear reaction appears before perception of a threat. That is, when we find ourselves in a situation in which there is a danger that can have negative consequences for us. For example, you may be afraid of losing your job since it has negative effects on your economy, your well-being and your quality of life.

The fear is not only due to the situation, but also to what it implies for each person. For example, if you are sure that, if you lose a job, you could easily find another one with the same conditions, the threat would disappear and with it the fear.

Therefore, the causes of the fear reaction are both:

  • The situation the dangerous.
  • The lack of resources to face it.

Both the threat that the situation implies and the lack of resources to confront it It could be real or it could be a perception.. The second option is more common and is due to the following personal characteristics:

  • Biased self-concept: a distorted image of oneself.
  • Negative or unstable self-esteem: a poor assessment of oneself or that this assessment changes according to external events.
  • Lack of trust: absence of security and hope.
  • Pessimism: tendency to observe reality from a negative perspective.

The psychological strategies used in therapy to overcome fears are the following:

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1. Work on your self-concept

To overcome fears and insecurities, the first step is self-knowledge. Know yourself: observe yourself and reflect about your characteristics, your capabilities, your abilities, your achievements, your strengths and your weaknesses. To do this, you can carry out the exercise of describing yourself in the most objective way possible. You can also ask people you trust to describe you in a letter and then compare the information.

2. Train your positivity

How to overcome fears and worries? We all see reality through a filter. Your filter may be negativity and focusing only on possible negative consequences is inflating your fear. Train your positivity with the following.

3. Work on your self-esteem

While self-concept is the set of characteristics that we see in ourselves, self-esteem is the assessment we make of these characteristics. Good self-esteem is a positive self-esteemthat is, valuing yourself well, and a stable self-esteemthat is, specific events do not change this assessment.

Fear is related to self-esteem in the following way. For example, you may be afraid of an exam because you think your grades determine your worth. That is, you may think that failing a test says that you are not smart enough, good enough, talented enough, or valid enough. That’s because self-esteem is unstable, it is not anchored to your person, but to relative qualities or abilities. Therefore, he staggers before an event. By strengthening self-esteem, some of these fears disappear. It can be improved by training the self acceptance and the .

4. Recognize fear

How to overcome fears and anxiety? The first step to overcoming fears, phobias, anxiety, worries or personal insecurities is to recognize and accept them. Spending energy is hiding your fears, it is unproductive. It is true that showing your fears highlights your vulnerability, but remember that to be human is to be imperfect and vulnerable.

5. Talk about it

After recognizing it, talk about it naturally and normally. By sharing your fears, other people may also open up and share theirs with you. Being able to interact without masks and being able to share what worries you will give you peace of mind and security, in addition to the benefits of the support of these people.

6. Stop the fear of fear

It is common to observe that what is most feared is the fear reaction itself rather than the initial stimulus. For example, a person who is afraid of speaking in public, more than afraid of facing the situation of exposure to the audience, has fear of your own fear symptoms: palpitations, sweating, tremors, blockages, facial flushing, stuttering, tingling sensation, dizziness, difficulty breathing, suffocation, etc.

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If this is your case, you should know that this is the body’s normal reaction to danger. This physiological response has the objective of activating your muscles, offering you energy and enhancing your abilities so that you can face danger. It’s simply your body helping you survive.

7. Visualize

Visualizing is imagining a situation, it is a thought that involves the senses: vision, hearing, smell, taste, or kinesthetic sensations (movement, position and touch). Visualization works because the brain does not know how to differentiate what is real and what is imaginary. Thus, it has a similar chemical reaction to a situation and to imagining it. With visualization the same brain areas are activated than when the action is performed. Therefore, it is considered a good way to rehearse a behavior. It would be useful, for example, to face the .

Practicing visualization consists of imagining the situation with a large amount of detail that involves the perception of all the senses, emotions and sensations. It is recommended to use it together with relaxation to regulate physiological activation when faced with mental images.

8. Learn relaxation techniques

Relaxation techniques aim decrease physiological activation that produces stress, anxiety or fear. They work because they manage to activate the parasympathetic nervous system and partially inhibit the excessive functioning of the sympathetic system. Thus evoking a relaxation response or making the anxiety response incompatible.

Training in relaxation techniques is complementary to most techniques and treatments for anxiety problems. The most used are the and the .

9. Expose yourself to the feared stimulus

How to overcome fears and phobias? The technique par excellence to overcome irrational fears is exposure. This behavioral technique is based on the principle of habituation, which consists of reducing the intensity of the response to the continued repetition of a harmless stimulus. I mean, yes you regularly face a situation which is not harmful, your emotional reaction will become less and less. The exhibition can be in different forms:

  • Live exhibition: which consists of exposure to the feared stimulus in reality.
  • Exhibition in imagination: It means exposing yourself by imagining the situation that produces fear.
  • Exhibition through virtual reality or augmented reality: exposure through virtual or augmented reality technological tools.

The exposure should be gradual, accompanied by the practice of relaxation and better if guided by a professional.

10. Live with fear

If you ask yourself “how to stop having”, you should know that fear will never completely disappear. Just as the phrase says: Fear does not go away, it is not a stain. It is an emotion and, like the others, it must be managed and regulated. The steps to manage an emotion are:

  1. Perceive it: be aware of it
  2. Identify it: name it
  3. Feel it: notice it and not fight to avoid it
  4. Listen to it: Emotions provide us with information that can serve as a guide. You may ask yourself: why am I feeling afraid now either What is causing this reaction?
  5. Let her go: Once the emotion has given you enough information and you have decided accordingly, you can let it go.
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In the following article you will find other interesting strategies for .

How to overcome fear according to psychology? To get rid of the discomfort caused by dysfunctional fear, it is necessary to get used to the sensations, change thought patterns and learn to manage the emotion. To do this, in addition to the previous strategies, you can practice these exercises to understand and manage fear:

Walking with a bandage

An exercise to work on fear and insecurity consists of blindfolding yourself. With your eyes closed and without vision, would you start running? Listen to your body. The emotion of fear appears because it can be dangerous. However, you can start walking. Little by little, slowly, put one foot forward and then the other. Help yourself with other senses, sounds, hands, etc. Pay attention to what you are feeling… how fear and insecurity are descending as you walk. When there is no perceived danger, security increases. Keep walking.

expressly make a fool of yourself

A good way to overcome fear and insecurities is to consciously expose yourself to a situation that makes you feel afraid, anxious, insecure… For the exercise to work, you must expose yourself to the end, not back down or avoid the situation, but rather wait until your feeling of fear reduces. You can do or say something embarrassing, something that doesn’t make sense, something absurd that you know is going to be ridiculous. For example, sitting on the street, asking someone if they like noodle soup, or dancing on the train.

Decide what action you are going to take and pay attention to your previous sensations. Nerves, fear, sweating, rapid heart rate and breathing? That is the reaction that your body has when faced with fear, the body prepares to face danger. After making a fool of yourself and seeing that nothing happens, surely the symptoms will decrease until they disappear. How do you feel now? Repeating the exercise many times will help you overcome your fears and gain confidence in yourself or yourself.

Here you will find .