In these times we spend many hours outside the home, both adults at work and our sons and daughters at school and extracurricular activities. When the day is over, what we want is to rest and enjoy our family. But it’s not always easy. Discussions about who takes out the trash, whether or not there is order in the house or whether dishes were left unwashed are very common.
Coping with this situation becomes another job and becomes a source of stress and discomfort. At Psychology-Online we know how difficult family coexistence can be, that is why in this article, we help you with 10 tips on how to improve family coexistence.
What is family coexistence
Family coexistence is relationships that exist between members of a family, whatever the type, in the place where they live together. It includes the way of communicating, the roles of the different members, the activities, the responsibilities of each one, etc.
No two families are the same, so there are no guidelines that work for everyone. Any improvement that we want to make in family coexistence requires taking into account the special conditions of the family, as well as the individual characteristics of each of its members. At the end of this article you have 10 tips to improve family coexistence.
Types of family coexistence
There are so many types of family coexistence. Sometimes all members live together. Others, as is the case with shared custody, the children live with each parent for a period of time. Others are expanded with the arrival of another member from outside the family nucleus, such as a grandfather or grandmother, uncles or cousins. Let’s see some types of family coexistence:
- Nuclear family: It’s the classic family. Fathers or mothers and children who live together.
- single parent family: one of the parents and their sons or daughters.
- extended family: the nuclear family and some external members such as grandparents, uncles, etc.
- Reconstituted family: one of the members of a new couple or both bring children to a new relationship.
Why family coexistence is important
A well-structured and managed family life can improve family life and provide security to different members. A healthy environment in which there is respect, tolerance, love and understanding will make a difference in the development of children and family life.
Each of the members will benefit from good family coexistence in general. This will become more evident when a problem arises that the family must face. On the other hand, a difficult coexistence in which there is no understanding, communication or that is governed by authoritarian rules, can affect the self-esteem of its members and alienate them. Good coexistence is what distinguishes a house from a home. In this article, we tell you.
Tips to improve family coexistence
How to improve family coexistence? Finally, don’t miss the following 10 tips to know what is needed for a good family life:
- Establish fair rules: Rules in a family are very important, but the most important thing is that they have meaning. By this I mean that, sometimes, family members, especially children, do not understand why they can or cannot do a series of things. Therefore, whether it is schedule rules, food, order or any other issue, they must have a reason. If you write the rules, you can refer to them when necessary. In addition, you can adapt some with the collaboration of all family members.
- Distribute the tasks: When distributing tasks you must take into account age, the time each person spends at home, their possibilities and their responsibilities. We are not going to ask a boy or girl to be in charge of the meals, but they can help set up and clear the table, make sure the pet does not lack water, water the plants, etc. If everyone has their own function, discussions about tasks will decrease.
- Plan family activities: Whether watching a movie or spending the day at the beach, family leisure activities serve to unite its members. This way you will get out of the routine of tasks, duties or work and learn to value time together.
- Hold family gatherings: Another tip to improve family coexistence is to hold family meetings. It is good that at least once a week you all sit down and talk. Everyone must have their turn to tell what they want without interruptions or distractions. Communication will improve, unity and belonging to the group will become stronger.
- Dedicate separate time to each child: Although family activities and meetings serve to unite the family, we must not forget that each of the sons or daughters has individual needs and requires time alone with their parents.
- Responsibilities of each member: to have a harmonious coexistence as a family, each member must have their responsibilities well defined. Keep your things in order, both in your space and in common spaces, for example.
- Eat as a family: We have so many things to do each on our own that it becomes difficult to coincide. Therefore, whenever possible, eat as a family.
- Make a family group: A family group on an instant messaging social network can be helpful. If any problems arise or there is a change in plans, everyone will be informed.
- Work on assertive communication: many times it is not what is said, but how it is said. That’s why investing a little time in improving the way you communicate with each other can make a difference. Knowing how to ask for what you need and showing disagreement with the rules, without offending, are some of the things you will learn about .
- Share quality time: quality time is the opposite of sitting looking at your smartphones. A little quality time has much more value than hours and hours together, but absent.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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Bibliography
- Castanyer, O. (2003). Assertiveness: expression of healthy self-esteem. Bilbao: Desclée de Brouwer
- Coca, A. (2017). The life of the little one: A child with separated parents. Catalonia: Edicions de Rúbrica Editorial.
- Hayman, S. (2010). My children and your children: Create a new family and live together successfully. Madrid: Pyramid.