In the realm of imagination, when a person immerses themselves in this realm of fantasy, anything is possible. However, reality imposes its limits. And this is observable, also, in love. There are different circumstances why a story may not be viable in the present for the protagonists. Maybe that person is married and is not willing to leave his or her partner.
Maybe there is no reciprocated love. Perhaps the enormous distance is an insurmountable barrier for both of us. Or, maybe, someone fell in love with his best friend. How to forget an impossible love? In Psychology-Online we give you the keys so that you know how to forget a love.
What is an impossible love
A story of this type is one whose plot breaks the protagonist’s personal desire. That is, there is a limit that establishes a barrier to the lover’s own will. In this way, when the protagonist observes the viability of this story in the reality of his life, there is no harmony. This emotional experience, an impossible love, has a dramatic tone for the one who wishes to give her love, however, cannot do so freely.
It is then when becoming aware of the impossibility of that love, the initial illusion of falling in love transforms into a source of frustration, sadness and anger. When a person finds themselves in a story of this type, events do not progress in a natural way.
When it exists an impossible love It is the protagonists who have determined by their own decision that this impossibility remains real. That is, they are not willing to make changes, assuming the consequences, to live this impossible love.
5 reasons to forget an impossible love
Sometimes it happens that when a person is at this point they feel that no reason is strong enough to make the definitive determination to forget. However, the reasons for forgetting are a source of motivation. Therefore, below we present the 5 main reasons for forget an impossible love, although there may be many more depending on each situation. Which are yours?
1. You deserve to be happy
It is paradoxical, however, while the lover feels that his happiness depends on being reciprocated, remaining in that situation for a long time is the cause of true unhappiness. For example, this fact damages your self-esteem.
2. Learn to be present
Living in the present is an attitude of happiness. However, when a person experiences an impossible love they are in a constant internal struggle. For example, he is in person in a place, however, his mind revolves around this unresolved chapter. Here we offer you good ones.
3. Wisdom
When you experience a process of this type, you have the opportunity to reflect and extract deep learning about what happened. For example, you may come to the conclusion that this feeling is unhealthy because it distances you from your self-love when you put this story before even your own well-being.
4. Value what you have
Focusing on unrequited love leads you to live focused on the lack of what you would like to achieve but prevents you from enjoying the reasons for gratitude in your existence.
5. Live a reciprocated love
In order for life to flow, find yourself and be able to make space for this feeling, first of all, you have to close this chapter.
Forgetting an impossible love is not a simple experience, therefore, if you need psychological help, consult the advice from a specialist.
How to forget an impossible love: 8 tips
How to forget an unrequited love? It is not easy to forget a love, but here we explain what you can do to turn the page:
1. Remember that it is an impossible love
In a situation of this type, it is usually common for the lover to have difficulties to accept reality just as it is. Therefore, he lives in a constant struggle between reality itself and the inner story he tells himself. A story that revolves around what may happen. How to remember that it is an impossible love? Taking into account the reality of the facts beyond desires.
What is the reason why this love can be described as impossible? Identify this aspect and remember it more frequently.
2. Accept the facts
Yes, sometimes things are not as we would like them to be. Sometimes our desires are one and the facts are another. How to forget an unrequited love? It is important to stick to reality, observe the facts objectively (or as objectively as possible) and practice total acceptance of reality. It can be complex, since things are often expected to change and improve, even when there is objective evidence that this is not the case. However, it is necessary to accept reality in order to live a real life and not an imaginary one. This article can help you do this: .
3. Trust the people who love you
When someone experiences an impossible love and suffers so much that those closest to them also worry about their well-being. It is likely that you will not find it pleasant to listen to the advice of those people who, as confidants of your history, suggest that you forget it permanently.
However, the opinion of those loved ones gives you a valuable information from reality since, from their position, they have an external point of view and since they are not emotionally involved in this situation, they can observe reality more clearly. Talk about the topic with people you completely trust.
4. Listen to your feelings
Impossible love can also be reinforced by idealization filter. However, it is advisable that you listen to your feelings to become aware that this discomfort you feel should not be prolonged unnecessarily. When you think you are facing someone perfect, when you feel that that person is the only one who can make you happy, connect with the reality of your heart. Observe the wear and tear of feelings that remind you of the pain of this story. Because those feelings are giving you valuable information. This pain is not worth waiting forever.
5. Break virtual contact
The complexity of love in the age of social networks means that the process of turning the page not only has to occur in reality itself, but also, in the digital environment. If you receive constant stimuli of information about that person’s life through their publications, then this memory leads you to delay forgetting as a desirable goal when you find yourself in this circumstance. How to forget an impossible love? Trying to ensure that contact is non-existent.
6. Don’t play at being a fortune teller
Those who live an impossible love in the present may look for some light of hope in the future. However, do not make hypotheses about what may happen. Different paths may occur in tomorrow, however, the present is the only thing that matters.
How to forget an impossible love? When you feel your mind leading you to focus on the future, reconnect with the now through immediate occupation or by focusing your attention on the information you receive through your senses. and in your immediate future but giving space to other aspects of your life.
7. Plans to meet new people
When that person occupies a good part of your thoughts, it is recommended that you try to distract yourself and meet new people, in addition to staying with your usual environment. How to forget an impossible love? Living.
8. Letter to an impossible love
This psychological exercise can be very useful if we find it difficult to cut the mental thread that still unites us to that person. It is important to point out that you should not write this letter so that someone can receive it, but rather to vent and do an exercise in inner dialogue.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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Bibliography
- Cid, LRG (2019). Burning nails: keys to love addictions and conflicts in healthy and pathological relationships. Octahedron Editions.
- Riso, W. (2003). To love or depend?: how to overcome emotional attachment and make love a full and healthy experience. Norma Publishing.