What is a hypocritical person? The most common characteristic of this type of subject is the lack of coherence between what they say and what they do. These are people who, for various reasons, speak out in a way that they are subsequently incapable of carrying out.
If you want to know more about this unpleasant behavior and what to do with hypocritical people, in the following Psychology-Online article we will explain what hypocrisy is, we will describe the characteristics of a hypocritical person and we will detail how to treat these types of people.
What is hypocrisy
Hypocrisy, according to the RAE, is the “pretense of qualities or feelings contrary to those that are truly felt or experienced.” Hypocrisy means try to be or seem like something you are not.
Hypocrisy, in itself, is a behavioral manifestation that is not usually well accepted because generates discomfort and lack of confidence in people who are victims of said behavior. For example, no one likes to associate with a person who talks about the importance of teamwork and caring behavior and yet then escapes from prosocial behaviors and acts in a completely selfish manner.
Why people are hypocrites
The reasons for this pretense may be:
- Conscious: for example, wanting to pretend to be something to seduce someone, to get something, to apply for a job, etc.
- Unconscious: for example, when a person with low self-esteem tries to simulate a way of being that does not suit them in order to be accepted.
Hypocrisy, whether conscious or unconscious, arises as a result of having closed one’s heart in the face of certain negative experiences and having adopted such a behavioral attitude as .
In reality, much of the hypocritical behavior is due to the social system in which we find ourselves, in which we are subjected to rhythms and ways of life that are often contrary to our most internal needs, so hypocrisy becomes into a possible tool to follow what has been assigned to us and, simultaneously, try to meet needs and desires.
What is it to be a hypocritical person?
A hypocritical person is one who says one thing but does another. We could differentiate between two basic manifestations of hypocritical behavior: as a defense mechanism or due to social dictate.
Now, all manifestations of hypocrisy are due to continuous internal dissonances between what the real being longs for and what has been internalized as a norm or is dictated from outside. It is this dissonance that causes the incoherence between the word said and the act performed.
Defense mechanism
Those that occur in people who adopt this vital attitude as a personal trait. In this first case, the person adopts hypocrisy as a trait of their personality, constituting it as one that protects them from prior emotional deficiencies or wounds.
Social opinion
Those that occur daily, randomly and frequently in the majority of people who live in Western capitalist societies. As we have previously commented, the ways of life of current Western capitalist societies are, on many occasions, detrimental to basic human needs.
These primary needs are calm and tranquility, contact with nature, cordial social relationships, etc. For this reason, people are forced to act hypocritically to survive social dictates, but without dying in the attempt.
This is how, for example, there are people who show a certain attitude at work, but outside of it they show another when they are “forced” to be a certain way. depending on job demands. On other occasions, a person may say yes to things in front of a social group but subsequently avoids and does nothing of what was said.
What are the characteristics of a hypocritical person
The basic characteristics that distinguish hypocritical and false people or specific hypocritical behaviors are the following:
- or inconsistency between what is said and what is done.
- Lack of compromise.
- Inability to be assertive.
- Double standard.
- Lack of courage of the person to, once their deepest desires have been clarified, seek a vital solution that allows them to achieve them in the social context in which they find themselves.
- They use masks to pretend at every moment what we are expected to be.
Consequences of being a hypocritical and false person
Hypocrisy, this continued use of social masks, can mean in the medium or long term a decline in physical, emotional and psychological health of the person while, for each hypocritical behavior, he simultaneously implements two opposing mechanisms (bodily, emotional, etc.), so his personal strength will be affected and diminished at all levels, potentially seriously affecting his overall health. .
As with other behavioral pathologies or patterns of behavior derived from social conditioning, it is advisable for hypocritical people to question the extent to which their way of acting benefits them or is depriving them of free, assertive and peaceful behavior.
How to treat a hypocritical person
To deal with a subject who meets all the characteristics of a hypocritical person, we must take into account that, in most cases, the person in question is not aware of their dissonance. That is why our attitude or behavior in this regard It will depend on several aspects:
- The degree of depth and intimacy of the relationship.
- The grievance of accepting such hypocritical behavior.
- The personality of the hypocritical person.
- Vulnerability to possible unmasking.
Depending on these aspects, among others, our response to hypocrisy can range from assertively communicating the problem to the person who acts in this way or simply being compassionate and understand that the person acts subjected to a defense mechanism which does not allow him to act freely and spontaneously.
This compassionate attitude allows you to accept the person, despite the discomfort of their behavior. And it is precisely this behavior of understanding and compassion that will help, more than anything else, the hypocritical person increase confidence in people, in life and in themselves, which will allow them to take risks, in the next occasion, to show itself as it is.
If you found this post about the characteristics of a hypocritical person interesting, we recommend you read it.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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Bibliography
- Rojas, L. (2021). Live together and share. Penguin Random House.