Many think that forgiving infidelity is not having dignity. Others believe it is good and okay. And infidelity is an abstract concept anchored in subjectivity, since each person establishes their own limits of respect and loyalty in the couple.
In general terms, infidelity can be understood as affectionate contact with another person other than your partner, whether boyfriend/girlfriend, husband, or person with whom you maintain an official relationship. Whether or not to forgive infidelity is a very popular debate today. Therefore, in this Online Psychology article, we will reflect on whether Can infidelity be forgiven.
After infidelity, when to continue and when not to?
First of all, it is important to assess your current situation. It is not the same whether the infidelity was on the part of a couple in a short-term relationship, or whether your husband committed the infidelity. One has to assess the type of bond and the feelings that bind us to that person. In addition, we must take into account what the infidelity has been like, whether it is about forgiving an infidelity on WhatsApp, in a virtual conversation, a kiss or if there has been sexual relations.
In the same way, when it comes to forgiving infidelity, we must take into account the duration and frequency Of the same. For example, know if you are struggling to forgive an infidelity during your courtship, if it was punctual and fleeting, or if the infidelity has been repeated and a connection has been established with the other person on a sentimental level.
In that case, we would be talking about how to forgive emotional infidelity. If you don’t know what we mean, in this article you will find information about what the . Another point to take into account is the issue of family, that is, if there is no bond that unites you beyond the relationship as a couple.
When to forgive infidelity
The decision to continue with your partner after infidelity is a personal choice, since no one knows better than you what you feel about the other person and how infidelity has affected you. Even so, it is important to keep in mind that if infidelity is going to cause a psychological and emotional burden, as well as a constant reproach against the partner, perhaps the relationship needs to be reconsidered.
Once all the areas mentioned above have been evaluated, we must weigh the consequences of the decision made and ask yourself if it is worth rebuilding the relationship. If you decide on the latter case, in this article, we will tell you.
Can you forgive infidelity in marriage and trust again?
It is possible to forgive infidelity in marriage and trust our partner again, it is all a matter of working together to solve the problems that exist in the relationship and enhance communication between both. Below, we show you what key aspects are important to forgive infidelity in marriage:
- Detect the origin of that infidelity in order to make sense of what happened.
- Forgive yourself and forgive the other: If we are not able to forgive sincerely, it will be very difficult to regain trust in each other and in the relationship.
- Share both the positive and the negative of the relationship: The couple’s goal should be to enhance the positive and work to eliminate the negative to rebuild the relationship together and with strong foundations. This step is essential to detect the needs and desires of the other.
- Respect the healing rhythm of each one: Restoring trust in your partner takes time. We must be aware of our pain, embrace it and allow ourselves to cry and let out everything that torments us.
- Be honest with yourself: analyze if we can really forgive the infidelity and continue forming a healthy relationship or if, on the contrary, continuing with the relationship will mean a loss of well-being.
- Work on mutual sincerity: see if we can count on the other person when we have doubts or when we do not feel safe with the partner.
If you have any questions, in this article you will find more information about .
How to treat your partner after infidelity
When we decide to continue with our partner after infidelity, once we have clarified the situation, we must identify aspects to improve and reestablish limits. It is crucial that both members of the couple commit to improving the aspects that harm the relationship.
When in doubt about how to treat your partner after infidelity, the most important thing is to do it from love and respect, avoiding negative attitudes. If we act out of resentment, or by focusing daily on what happened, it will be impossible to return to a healthy relationship, since we will constantly be asking ourselves the reason for the infidelity and reliving the discomfort caused by said event. So, if you choose to forgive infidelity, you must learn to trust your partner again.
How to overcome infidelity
Forgiving an infidelity is good if you choose it for yourself, but what happens after forgiving an infidelity? Giving your relationship a second chance and trusting again will be easier if you follow the following recommendations.
Improve self-esteem
To overcome infidelity you have to work on two levels. On the one hand, we have to work on ourselves to strengthen our self-esteem and our security. For example, it is important spend time on our self-care and doing pleasant activities without our partner. If you need more information about , in this article we show you different ways to do it.
Work on the relationship
Another key to overcoming infidelity is improve communication to avoid confusing situations and promote trust and sincerity. If you are interested in improving in this aspect, in this article we show you what to do when faced with .
In addition, also sharing time with your partner, both for leisure and reflection, will help rekindle passion and feelings. On the other hand, to overcome infidelity it is necessary to share the needs and concerns of each person.
Go to therapy
If you want to forgive infidelity and continue with your partner, you must also take into account the emotional factor, which, on many occasions, do not allow us to control the situation. Therefore, it is essential to ask for help and have the advice from a psychology professionalsince, sometimes, we cannot overcome the discomfort that infidelity can create on our own.
Furthermore, the fact that they are unfaithful to us means not only a betrayal on the part of our partner, but it also has a very powerful impact on our self-esteem and how we perceive ourselves. Therefore, whether you decide to continue with your relationship or not, there are many aspects to work on when forgiving infidelity.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to Can infidelity be forgiven?we recommend that you enter our category.
Bibliography
- Camacho, J. (2004). Fidelity and infidelity in relationships. Buenos Aires, Argentina: Dunken Editions. Available at: https://www.fundacionforo.com/uploads/pdfs/archivo42.pdf
- Romo, AVE, Romero, FEC, & García, LF (2014). Social perception of infidelity and love styles in couples. Teaching and Research in Psychology, 19(1), 135-147. Available at: https://www.redalyc.org/pdf/292/29232614008.pdf
- Vanegas Osorio, JH (2011). The dynamics linking jealousy-infidelity. Psychological Thought, 9(17), 97-102. Available at: http://www.scielo.org.co/pdf/pepsi/v9n17/v9n17a09.pdf