Love is a feeling of lively affection and inclination towards a person or thing to whom we wish everything good. Specifically, love in a relationship is defined as a feeling of intense emotional and sexual attraction towards a person with whom one wishes to share a life together. These definitions understand love as the creation of a bond and the existence of intense feelings. However, it is true that negative feelings may appear due to certain situations, which cause discomfort and, in your case, you do not know what to do.
If you are wondering why my partner makes me feel bad and what to do, keep reading! In this Psychology-Online article we explain it to you.
Why does my partner make me feel bad?
Relationships can be complicated and sometimes problems can arise that affect our happiness and emotional well-being. One of the main reasons why your partner makes you feel bad is that your partner is not willing to listen to you, ignores you or constantly criticizes you. Lack of communication can lead to frustration, resentment and loneliness.
Other possible causes that can make you feel bad because of your partner are the following:
- Low self-esteem.
- Lack of trust.
- Dysfunctional communication style.
- .
- Lack of support and commitment.
On the other hand, if your partner makes you feel bad it means that you have created a link, otherwise this negative feeling would not be possible. However, it is important to remember that no one deserves to be treated disrespectfully or abusive in a relationship. Therefore, if you constantly feel bad in your relationship, do not hesitate to seek support from friends, family or professionals such as therapists or counselors.
How my partner makes me feel bad
Your partner may use various methods that make you feel bad, and that may seem subtle to you since he or she doesn’t hit you or say anything exaggerated. Even so, we may find that your partner makes you feel bad because:
- Judges you and does not try to understand your situation: Not only does he give his opinion on a specific topic or explain to you what he thinks, but he exercises a value judgment on all or some of the situations that you experience and explain to him and that makes you uncomfortable. You don’t feel understood or valued in these situations.
- He insults or criticizes you, makes comments and engages in behavior that hurts you.: This may be one of the clearest and most visible ways that cause your partner to make you feel bad, however, sometimes these insults can be difficult to identify since they are very subtle, it can even occur through satire.
- Show an attitude of indifference towards things that matter to you: what happens to you and excites you causes indifference in your partner, making you feel less important and undervalued and even unskillful for certain situations
- Doesn’t support you: you are going through a bad time or you simply need support from your partner for some special reason and they do not offer it to you for whatever reason, something that makes you feel more insecure.
- He blames everything on you and he/she does everything rightIt can hide many thoughts and emotions behind it, leaving it masked and causing an attitude of emotional distance with little emotional responsibility.
- Control your actions. Tells you what you should do and what you shouldn’t: It may initially appear to be in the form of advice, but in reality, over time you discover that it seeks to exercise control over what you do.
- Exercises some type of violence against you: There are several types of violence that one person can exert on another and we will see them below.
If you want to know more to be able to identify this type of abuse, we can help you with our post.
Types of violence that your partner can exert on you
Mainly, we can distinguish the following types of violence:
- Physical: usually begins after psychological violence. Any force is considered physical violence exerted against the body with the result or risk of producing physical injury or damage. Some examples would be: pushing, pulling, slapping, kicking…
- Psychological: all psychological violence is considered verbal or non-verbal behavior that produces a feeling of devaluation or suffering, through threats, humiliation or humiliation, demand for obedience or submission, coercion, insults, isolation, blaming or limitations of their sphere of freedom.
- Economic: affects economic subsistence through limitations aimed at control incomethe control of social development, or explicit control of the amounts of money handled.
- Social: he isolates or humiliates himself socially and deprives himself of interpersonal relationships.
- Sexual: sexual act or attempt to obtain a sexual act by violence or coercion.
In the following article you will find more information about the different ones.
What to do when your partner makes you feel bad
Here are some tips that you can keep in mind when your partner makes you feel bad on certain occasions:
What to do when your partner has behaviors that bother you
When a woman or man makes you feel bad, and even more so if it is your partner, It is important that you know those things that bother you. Sometimes it may happen that your partner is not aware of what he is doing and that he takes out his internal discomfort with you because you are his secure bond.
That is why unity and constructiveness is very important in relationships, since from this perspective you will be able to openly and spontaneously express your ideas, feelings and thoughts.
What to do when your partner exercises financial control over you
If you feel that your partner tries to control what you do, how you do it, who you do it with and even what you spend your money on, and this bothers you and makes you feel bad, it is important that you do not give in to those controls from the first moment. in which you detect it since, if not, this may increase generating very uncomfortable situations between you.
What to do when your partner throws everything in your face
That your partner throws everything in your face may mean that he is masking his own insecurities, that he wants to exert more control over you, or simply that he has a personality with a tendency or avoidance and lack of empathy.
On the one hand, it is essential Let your partner work on himself, whether due to his/her insecurities or lack of empathy, since it is something that is affecting the relationship and he/she must also work on it. On the other hand, It is important that you empower yourself and do not consent to this type of behavior. To do this, it is good to analyze the situation and see if your partner is right in what he is telling you, although it may not be the forms, that will be something else to work on.
After analyzing it carefully, become aware of what is happening and what may be behind your partner throwing everything in your face and, above all, work on yourself. Try to increase your confidence, don’t blame yourself, communicate and look for solutions together. If you are interested in learning more about the topic, we recommend reading our article
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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Bibliography
- Congost, S. (2013). When loving too much is depending. Oniro.
- Cuervo, JS, (2013). Viable couples that last over time. Divers.: Perspect. Psychol. 9 (2), 257-270
- Mendiguchía, C., (2021). Intervention in crises and emergencies in gender violence. Official College of Psychologists of Eastern Andalusia. Malaga