There are many types of liars. Those who lie to appear better, those who lie out of shame, out of fear, to get something, but there are also those who are true professionals. Those people who believe their own lies and act as if everything they say is real. And these are the most complicated, because they will fight against all odds to make you believe what they say.
But how do you confront someone who lies to you? In this Psychology-online article, we want to help you be prepared to know what to do when they lie to you and you know the truth.
How to know if someone is lying
How do you know if a person is lying or telling the truth? We commonly believe that there are infallible keys to knowing when someone is lying. However, there is only one sure way to unmask a liar: with evidence. The rest of the tactics or strategies you can use are not conclusive, but they alert you to signs that the other person may be lying to you. Let’s see the keys to know if someone is lying:
- Line of conduct: What can give you the most data to notice changes in someone’s behavior is knowing how they behave on a regular basis. If you start from there, you will be able to observe some different gestures than usual. If you know how he expresses himself, if he is usually relaxed or nervous or looking into the eyes, you will notice the changes more accurately. But be careful, it is not 100% effective, as some people change their behavior when they feel pressured.
- Background: If you know that this person has lied to you before, or frequently does so, the probability that they are lying increases significantly. Who doesn’t know someone who lies almost as much as he talks?
- Alibis: If you’re wondering how to catch a liar, doing so will depend a lot on the context. If the person you distrust has an alibi with a friend, ask questions they don’t expect to have to answer. Simple things like what station was playing when they were in the car or if they had the drink in a glass or a bottle.
- The history backwards: Lie detection professionals use a technique that involves asking the suspect to tell what happened starting from the end. Based on their story, they can identify errors in the story and find out where they are lying.
- Interruptions: Change the subject in the middle of the story and see their reaction. Someone who lies will be relieved by the change of subject. If you tell the truth, you will be surprised and ask why this change occurred.
- Increases pressure (cognitive stress): Asks a lot of details and then asks them again in a different way. If you have been under cognitive stress, you may be slow to respond or give a different response. This tactic is not very reliable because a person who is telling the truth and is somewhat dazed can also doubt or make a mistake. Discover
- Gestures and communication style: Shy people have a hard time making eye contact and it doesn’t mean they are lying. “If he responds defensively, he is lying”… It could be, but it is not certain, or would it not be reasonable for him/her to feel attacked with so many questions? Whether or not you look at your hands, whether you look to the left or right, etc. They may be signs, but all these gestures have an alternative explanation, therefore, they are not always true.
- Intuition: Perhaps your instinct is the most powerful weapon to detect when you are being lied to. Take advantage of your intuition and look for data that confirms it. If you are especially jealous or jealous, this is not a good technique because it is conditioned.
What to do when they lie to you
Know what to do when they lie to you when you know they are doing it, It will depend a lot on the situation, of your relationship with the person and of the consequences of lying.
Knowing what to do when you are lied to and you know the truth is not easy. If the person who is lying to you is your partner, it is best to talk to his or her partner calmly and let him or her know that you know that he or she is lying. Ask him the reason for his lies and explain that relationships usually don’t work if there is no sincerity.
If the lie you have identified fits within the “white lies”, such as when a family member or close friend hides an illness from you or a colleague omits what has been said about you in a meeting because it has no significance, you can continue with your life without Mention it to them so as not to create conflict. On the other hand, you can also tell them that you know the truth to obtain more information about the matter. If you know the other person well, you will act in the most appropriate way..
In this article, you will find information about .
How to treat a lying person
Let’s assume that no one likes to be lied to. When someone tells you something that you know is a lie, it offends you. You feel offended because you assume that person thinks you are stupid or thinks you are not very intelligent.
So how do you treat a person who lies to you? Well think about their motives and what is best for you. There are times when it is better to play along with the liar than to try to make him change. When faced with a habitual liar, there is little you can do if you want to continue having a relationship with him/her, either because you have no other choice or because you want him/her to continue in your life.
If the lies are stories in order to get noticed or seem interesting, they have no impact on your life and can be ignored. If on the contrary, affect you in some way, you better confront the liar. Most often, he denies everything until he is cornered or invents new lies to explain the first ones. But in the end he will confess and when he does, you will know the reasons that lead him to lie. In this article, we tell you how.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to What to do when they lie to you and you know the truthwe recommend that you enter our category.
Bibliography
- Forner Navarro, P (2018). Direct your life. Madrid: Planet.
- Moisés de la Serna, J. (2015). Mythomania: Discovering the Compulsive Liar. Tektime.
- Rock, E. (2003). How to improve your social skills. Valencia: ACDE Editions.