The asexuality in a very fashionable concept, which never stops changing and evolving constantly, adapting to new discoveries and approaches to it. While some authors conceive it as an alteration, whether physical or psychological, others state that it is a sexual orientation.
Whatever your definition, what can be understood as an asexual person? Is asexuality a problem? How can you know if we are dealing with a case of asexuality? All this and much more is what we will answer in this Psychology-Online article about what is it to be asexual.
Definition of asexual: a sexual orientation
An asexual person is one who has a absence of sexual desire for other people. However, asexuality only refers to the sexual sphere itself, and other types of attraction are not altered. In this way, an asexual individual feel romantic, intellectual, or emotional attraction by other people as a non-asexual one. However, he does not feel sexual attraction.
For these reasons, most experts are inclined to define asexuality as a sexual orientation, such as heterosexuality or homosexuality. For this reason, asexuality is not considered a disease or pathology, since, although it can affect romantic relationships, it is not an alteration in itself.
What is it to be an asexual person?
Being asexual means not feeling the desire to have sexual relations with other people. Thus, one asexual person I wouldn’t experience excitement. However, this does not mean that someone who is asexual is incapable of maintaining relationships, as many maintain that, although they do not experience pleasure from the relationship itself, they can become physically aroused, as well as enjoy the pleasure your partner feels.
Asexuality is a condition that has been present at all times throughout history, although it was not until the second half of the last century when it began to be studied and conceptualized. Previously, it was considered that asexuality, far from being a sexual inclination or orientation like the others, was a problem linked to physical or mental disorders of different kinds and severity. Luckily, today this categorization has been strongly refuted, putting an end to these false beliefs, since they condition and label people who do not have any problem as sick. Thanks to research, information and education on sexuality, asexuality can now be understood as a sexual orientation.
You can see the different orientations.
What characteristics does an asexual person have?
Being asexual is something that often goes unnoticed, both by those around you and, on many occasions, by the person themselves. Therefore, we give you some information about the signs or signs of asexuality that characterize an asexual person and that can help us identify asexuality more clearly, both in oneself and in one’s partner.
- Lack of sexual attraction.
- Not feeling the need to have sexual contact, even if you haven’t had intercourse for a while.
- Feeling pressure to enjoy sexual relations.
- Having doubts about sexual orientation, since an asexual person feels that something is not right or that he or she does not fit into the usual social patterns.
- Having a greater ability to connect with others on an emotional level than a physical or sexual one.
Seeing the characteristics of an asexual person, you may ask: Can an asexual person have a partner? Do you have sexual relations? Asexual people can have a partner, they can fall in love and enjoy an emotional, loving and romantic bond. They can even, if they want, have sexual relations even if they do not feel sexual excitement.
Many asexuals resort to negotiation when they are in a relationship, in this way, they can find a balance between their partner’s sexual desire and their lack of it. Therefore, an asexual person can maintain a normal relationship. Well, as in so many other aspects of life, the important thing is understanding and agreements established between the two parties. In this article you will find more information about .
Furthermore, you must differentiate between celibacy and asexuality. While an asexual person can maintain a sexual relationship without problems and without having to repress their desires, since they lack these, a celibate person usually has to make an extra effort to repress these desires, being a personal choice not to maintain these relationships.
Types of asexuality
When talking about asexuality, we must differentiate between different types, with different classifications, some of them are:
Romantic VS aromantic asexuals: While a romantic asexual seeks to have relationships, an aromantic one does not feel interest in this type of bond, preferring to establish close friendships. Within romantic asexuals, there are 4 types depending on their preference for having a partner:
- Heteroromantic: who are attracted to establishing relationships with people of the opposite sex.
- Homoromantics: preferring to maintain a relationship with people of the same sex.
- Biromantics: with equal attraction for both sexes.
- Panromantics: Attraction does not depend on the sex or gender of the other, only on the feeling towards the other.
Demisexuality: A demisexual person is one who feels sexual attraction only when it is accompanied by a romantic feeling, but never independently of it. Attraction being a consequence of said romantic feeling.
Grey-asexualidd: Someone is said to be grey-asexual when they oscillate in a continuous back and forth between asexuality and sexuality. In this way, these people usually present stages or periods of asexuality followed by others of sexuality.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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Bibliography
- Asexual Visibility and Education Network (2016). Fron Page. Retrieved November 21, 2019 from: http://www.asexuality.org/en/
- Asexual Visibility and Education Network (2016b). General FAQ. Retrieved November 21, 2019 from: http://www.asexuality.org/home/?q=general.html
- Carrigan, M. (2011). There’s more to life than sex? Difference and commonality within the asexual community. Sexualities, 14 (4), 462-478.
- Catri, F. (2016). Narrative review of asexuality in the human species as a sexual orientation. Psychology Notes, 34 (1), 5-18.