On special dates such as Valentine’s Day, both the streets and social networks are filled with affection and phrases of love. During that day couples tend to express their feelings towards each other. But not all of them are living true love because reaching this point in a relationship is something that requires effort and dedication.
Therefore, in Psychology-Online, we want to explain to you in a more detailed and scientific way what is love in psychology. In this article we will address the concept of love and its variants, as well as a series of aids to achieve pure and true love.
The meaning of love
Loving a person is often confused with feeling chemistry with them. Love goes much further than having an affinity with another person. To love is to respect, connect and feel completely free with each other.. It does not only imply demonstrating a feeling of physical attraction, but also showing affectively and emotionally what we feel.
Within the concept of loving, we find different types of love depending on the person to whom it is directed. For example, we find the family love, which is felt by the members of a family towards the rest of it. We also find the love towards our friends. Another type is love couple.
What does the concept of love include?
As regards the term loveaccording to the Larousse dictionary, it is the keen or the tendency to look for something or someone that represents true good or imaginary to enjoy it. It can manifest as an attraction, which does not have to be merely sexual, towards another person.
As we have seen in the previous point, we know that there are different types of love, however, that does not imply that one is better than the rest or that it is more love than another.
What is true love: characteristics and how to identify it
It is considered as true love that feeling of affection and commitment which one person has for another. This type of love is known as idealized, which comes from the ancient idea of romanticism, where all people are destined for another with whom we will experience pure and total love.
Sternberg (1949) created the triangular theory of love, where he puts three fundamental concepts in interaction to explain the different types of love. Here you will find . The components of love are intimacy, commitment and passion. If people can correctly combine these three concepts, consummate or true love develops. This is the representation of the complete form of love.
As we have said many times, each person is completely different from the rest, so trying to give exact guidelines for identify true love It is completely impossible. However, we can propose a series of indications which can help you assess whether you have found true love:
- love is the basis. Despite the ups and downs, when love is true, both members of the couple will work as a team to overcome that difficulty.
- Communication and trust. You must be able to talk to your partner with complete confidence about your relationship, as it is the best way to ensure complete understanding between both of you.
- Freedom. Identify if your partner sets limits or conditions for you, since true love is unconditional and is based on trust.
- absolute respect between the two is a very good sign of being part of true love.
What is love as a couple according to psychology
Love as a couple is the emotional relationship that two people share. Love as a couple is the decision to share time with a person and live experiences together. In this type of love, as we have seen in the previous section, 3 components must be present. According to Stenberg:
- The intimacy: love as a couple must consist of the feeling of closeness and union, the feeling of connection and the intention to create a bond.
- The passion: In the love of a couple, according to psychology, passion must be included, that energy and strength that pushes us towards that person. The attraction and excitement that it produces in us.
- Commitment: This component of couple love corresponds to the desire to maintain the bond and actions aimed at preserving the relationship in the long term.
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What is romantic love according to psychology
Within this point again we have to emphasize that sold love for movies, books, works of art. To romantic love based on romance and perfection where the girl finds her prince charming and where the man finds her princess.
However, this type of “imposed” love in our society has only achieved that love is considered a basic need in people’s lives, where, if you do not have a partner and you show yourself completely in love, this implies that you are going to end up just the rest of your life.
This kind of love, with more and more detractorsshows couples as members of an interaction where one is the property of the other, with the sole objective of showing in a narcissistic way how good and perfect their relationship is.
Thus, We should not let society impose guidelines on how to love. or to express our feelings to our partner, but we must focus all our attention on creating a base of trust and affection regardless of the rest of the people around us.
In the following article you will find more information about .
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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Bibliography
- Larrouse Dictionary, 2003. Sant Salvador. SPES Editorial SL. Barcelona.
- Pascual Fernández, A. (2016). About the myth of romantic love. Cinematographic loves and education.
- Bleeder, J.L. (1993). Psychosocial considerations about romantic love. Psychothema, 5(Sup), 181-196.
- Serrano Martínez, G., & Carreño Fernández, M. (1993). Sternberg’s theory of love. Empirical analysis