There are people who seem to have a magnet to attract others and there are also those who feel attracted to someone, but do not know exactly why. Both cases have something in common and it is that “match” or “crush” that basically feels like being “hooked” with someone. But what hooks a man on a woman or a man and vice versa?
In this Psychology-Online article, we explain What hooks one person to another through the 15 keys to attraction.
Physical
The first impression is a moment and a concept that exists, although it may seem superficial to many. It is prudent to emphasize that it is just that, first impression, so if someone is truly interested in getting to know another person, they will have to interact with him/her directly. However, this first impression does have value when it comes to hooking up, and physical appearance has a lot of weight, since that preconception about someone is one of the things that causes the intention to establish contact or not.
Remember that this aspect is closely linked to subjectivity, so the stereotype of “beauty” is not the same for everyone. We suggest you take this to your advantage and, instead of wanting to look like someone else, highlight your best features, because beauty is subjective.
Smell
The five senses interfere with the development of interpersonal relationships and the perception we form about other people. The perfume industry has tried for decades to favor each person’s aroma for their own olfactory delight and that of those around them, however, each person has hormonal loads, human biochemistry that gives each human being a characteristic odor. These odors are perceived by those around you and when interacting with the biochemical processes of the other, this particular odor can awaken your attraction. This process occurs unconsciously.
In this article we talk about the.
Voice
Similar to what happens with smell, the voice can attract. The tone, the volume, the voice itself is different in each being and It may or may not be pleasant to the ears of others.. Therefore, the voice is one of the elements of attraction to take into account when we want to know why one person is hooked on another.
Sense of humor
What is life without laughter? Like crying, laughter is a necessity, as well as an indicator of well-being. It should be noted that, with a sense of humor, we do not refer to making fun of others or making others laugh, but rather to the ability to enjoy and even laugh at oneself, since not everything in life It is seriousness or rigidity. Knowing that the search for well-being is in the nature of human beings, People tend to prefer to share with people who generate pleasant emotions.as is the case with humor.
Intelligence/knowledge
In recent times, greater emphasis and presence has been placed on the fact that not only beauty can make one fall in love or hook one another, but that intelligence also has this potential. Once physical beauty is discovered, people hope to find something else, something that makes them “stay” and that “something” is possibly intelligence, intellectual development, knowledge. Understanding intelligence as the ability to resolve conflicts through the use of one’s own cognitive abilities. and not only as the accumulation of information stored in an individual’s memory. Know the.
Demonstrations of affection
Something that tends to hook people are displays of affection. It should be noted that these are not always given or perceived in the same way, if we take into account what was proposed by Gary Chapman, who maintains that affection is demonstrated according to what we have learned on the subject since our childhood. Hence We all give love in different ways. So, a demonstration of affection can range from giving an object to a “how are you feeling today?”
Be attentive
Someone attentive will not go unnoticed. The person may not have an arsenal of charming techniques or a stunning physique, but how it makes others feel while sharing together, it is something that can make a difference.
Self-confidence
One of the most attractive characteristics for people is the security that they reflect. It is not about acting stubbornly, much less believing that everything you say or believe is the right thing, but about face life soberlydetermination, since this is interpreted by others as a trait of stability.
Self-sufficiency
Self-sufficiency is a virtue that is achieved in adulthood and that is generally involves personal development, cognitive and psycho-emotional skills, among the most important. Therefore, talking about a self-sufficient person implies that they have the ability to explore all areas of their life with as little help as possible and, therefore, they tend not to frequently require others to solve their situations. This trait can be attractive, since it represents the opposite of dependency. Dependency leads to wear and tear in individuals who relate to someone who is dependent.
Economic independence
Closely related to the previous item, patrimonial and financial independence is an attraction for people when looking for romantic relationships. It’s not about being valued for what you have, it’s more about the impression you generate with it, that is, who appears as financially independent does not expect help from the government or parents, for example, and projects that he has cognitive skills that have allowed him that independence. The attachment to this type of characteristics may be based on the search for stability.
emotional independence
Emotional independence is not about acting cold or disinterested, it is about have psycho and socio-emotional skills that allow establishing interpersonal relationships of reciprocity and quality. This trait can hook people because it impresses the presence of and, therefore, the subject in question is expected to behave assertively in emotional situations.
Future projection
Another reason for engagement is the person’s future projection. In this case, having short, medium or long-term projects and goals is a sign that the person probably has ambition, planning, security…In addition, it allows another person to see whether or not they plan similar or compatible futures.
Shared values
It is known that things in common between people tend to function as a bridge that unites them. To strengthen interpersonal relationships, then, you must find someone with whom you share important aspects in life such as values, ideals or tastes. Agreeing on these aspects will probably help the other person get hooked.
Flexibility
The way of taking on life is particular and subjective and that is wonderful, however, when one acts rigidly in the face of all life’s circumstances, it is generally due to the prejudices that are handled. A person who can see or assume situations from a flexible perspective will probably generate greater interest. in those around him.
Taste for the new
This item encompasses everything that has to do with exploring new situations, that taste that some people have for the new, for take risks and dare approve. In this sense, a person who is less predictable in terms of their daily routine may be more striking to others than someone with the opposite case. Certainly, routines are necessary and reflect stability, but that does not mean that life has to be rigid and unchanged.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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Bibliography
- Riso, W. (2007). The power of flexible thinking. Bogota Colombia. Norma Publishing.
- Chapman, G. (1995). The five languages of love. Colombia. Unilit.
- Goleman, D. (2005). Emotional intelligence: why it is more important than IQ. Barcelona. Editorial Javier Vergara Editor.