The concept of Oedipus complex It is used to refer to a normal and fundamental stage in the psychological development of the child based on the strong attachment to their maternal figure. However, if the Oedipus complex continues until they become adults, a problem may develop.
In this Psychology-Online article we will talk to you about the Oedipus complex in adults: symptoms, solution and consequenceswe are going to analyze in more detail what this disorder consists of, what the symptoms are in adults who suffer from it, the consequences of suffering from it and how it can be overcome.
What is the Oedipus complex: Freud’s theory
Before talking about the Oedipus complex in adults and what its symptoms are, it is important to define this concept exactly. The Oedipus complex was created by the father of psychoanalysis Sigmund Freud, who relies on a Greek myth to explain it. Broadly speaking, we define this phenomenon as the deep affection and bond with mother added to feeling of rivalry with father.
The Oedipus complex: Greek myth and psychological disorder
According to Greek mythology, King Laius was warned by an oracle that his son would kill him when he grew up, so when he was born he tied his feet and abandoned him on a mountain to die, however for some reason this did not happen. Some time later Epido, the King’s son, returned to Thebes and fulfilled his prophecy, killing his father, taking his place and having his mother as his wife without knowing it.
According to this stage of the development of the child’s personality, he begins to develop a particular love and tenderness for the mother. feel the father as his rival because he is occupying the place he wants. This occurs between 3 and 7 years of age, causing the child to feel rejection by the father of the same sex (which is perfectly normal at this stage) and is overcome when the child is able to identify with the father, and this desire for the mother disappears.
The negative Oedipus complex
However, there are people who they cannot overcome this stage of development and reach the age of 30 or more and are stuck in that stage of their life. At this point, the Oedipus complex or syndrome becomes pathological and must be treated.
The oedipus and electra complex
It is interesting to note that there is a variant of the Oedipus complex in women: the Electra complex. This was prepared by Carl Gustav Jung and is also based on classical mythology and is defined as follows:
Adult women with electra complex are characterized by developing a strong emotional bond with their father, similar to romantic attraction. These women have strong conflicts with their mothers, who are perceived as rivals.
If you want to know more about this phenomenon, we recommend reading the following article: .
Symptoms of the Oedipus complex in adults
When the adult man fails to overcome this normal stage of development and remains stuck in it, a series of characteristic behavioral and psychological symptoms appear that identify them.
Some of the Oedipus complex symptoms in adults The most common are the following:
- Exaggerated closeness with mother (they see or talk on the phone every day, they admire her in an exaggerated way, they put her as a priority before everything, even before their wife or girlfriend)
- Frequently asks for the mother’s advice and consent to make her own decisions
- Sometimes they may experience sexual impotence because the mother’s unconscious sexual desires are repressed every time she experiences sexual arousal.
- They are more likely to have relationships destined to fail.
- They frequently fall in love with impossible people.
- They may still be financially dependent on the mother
- They usually constantly changing partners since they cannot feel full. This happens because it is very difficult for them to mix tenderness and love with sexual desire. That is, they cannot see the wife as a companion and lover at the same time.
- They show a great inability to form stable relationships.
- They tend to get romantically involved with old people them
- They may be afraid to relate intimately with another person.
Consequences of not having overcome the Oedipus complex
The fact that an adult has not managed to overcome this stage in childhood or adolescence can bring with it a series of psychological repercussions that will be preventing a normal life and satisfactory. These repercussions affect you in one or more areas of your life and some of them can be described in this way:
- You will have serious difficulties to mature psychologically and develop their own character because it depends almost entirely on the mother’s opinion.
- It will be more difficult for you be self-sufficient by not becoming economically independent.
- You will experience constant feelings of frustration due to the inability to maintain a stable relationship.
- You are more likely to have couple conflicts
- Difficulties in achieving your own life goals and objectives
All of these situations are linked to suffering great emotional instability and lack of psychological and sexual self-esteem.
Oedipus complex in adults: solution and treatment
The Oedipus complex can be solved regardless of the person’s age. However, we must be aware that if he is deeply rooted it is not always that easy, but with sufficient motivation and willpower it can be achieved. Some useful tips to deal with it are detailed below:
Recognize the problem
The most important step to overcome it is for the adult who suffers from it to recognize that they have this problem. Why is it the most important? Because you cannot want to overcome something that you do not recognize in yourself. You must recognize and become aware of what is happening and how it is affecting your daily life as this is essential to find the motivation and willpower to eliminate it.
Let go of the “privileges” of being a child
Surely there is a resistance to “grow” due to the fear of taking charge of his own life and taking responsibility for himself, which in this case the mother has never encouraged. However, now that you are an adult, you must begin to do something to separate yourself from that role of child and begin to make your own decisions. How to achieve it?
You can start by identifying what you really want. no matter what your mother thinks or says and carry it out, another very important issue is to stop giving priority above all things, especially when romantic relationships are established where the couple becomes a priority, to moderate in terms of visits and phone calls, to seek to be independent financially and above all not be afraid of not always obtaining their approval.
Remember that it is necessary to cut the economic and/or economic cord and accept the departure in order to be a mature and independent adult.
Go to a professional
If you notice that the problem is persistent, it is affecting you in one or more areas of your life, you feel that you cannot combat it alone and/or you would simply like to receive external help to overcome it, it is necessary that you go to a psychologist to provide you with the tools you need to cope as well as to support you in this process.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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