Surely you have found yourself stuck on a certain thought on countless occasions. You spend hours and hours thinking about something that you are worried about happening or something that has already happened and you end up feeling very upset. On some occasions, you even end up having great discomfort.
You will have done everything possible to distract yourself and think about other things: watch a movie, meet friends or even sleep. However, what is in your head is still there, it does not go away and you cannot enjoy what happens in your daily life. Why do we think things we don’t want to think and what can we do about it?
In Psychology-Online we explain why the mind has uncontrollable negative thoughts and how to stop thinking about something you don’t want to think about. We will see different techniques used in psychology to know how to stop your head from thinking things you don’t want, how to control involuntary negative thoughts and how to get rid of them, so that you don’t get stuck in them and can continue with your life. In addition, we will also try to understand why this happens to you so that you can understand yourself a little more.
Why does my mind think things I don’t want to think about?
Why do we think over and over again about things we don’t want to think about? Surely you have many thoughts that distress you, fears about situations that may happen or about situations that have already happened. Our mind goes over them over and over again. Why do we have unpleasant repetitive thoughts?
- In the event that those involuntary bad thoughts are about possible future situations, it means that our mind is trying to prepare for the situationanticipating her.
- For its part, in the case of situations that have already happened, if they have been very shocking it is possible that the mind is trying to assimilate the information little by little.
In both cases, a function that was initially useful has become useless and all it does is cause discomfort. Since it is not pleasant to continually have uncontrollable negative thoughts.
What you probably don’t know is that by trying to eliminate these thoughts over and over again, you are strengthening those thoughts even more. If they tell you not to think about a pink elephant, can you not? This example reflects to us what exactly is happening in your mind. So what can we do when trying to see the positive things, distract ourselves, or even sleep so we don’t think hasn’t worked? We will see it below.
Remember they are just thoughts
How do I stop thinking about something I don’t want to think about? Think that they are just a set of letters or images, nothing more. Try putting the same thought in a language you don’t know, does it make sense? Surely not, so why if the letters are in a different order do they cause so much damage? Remember that they are just that, letters, images, and that They don’t have to have anything to do with reality.
Stop trying to delete them
To stop thinking about something that obsesses you, accept that those thoughts are there, annoying, but don’t spend time on them, neither for better nor for worse. Just as they have come, they will leave. Imagine that they are quicksand in which if you try to escape and get out of them you will sink deeper. This is something similar, so stop trying to fightr against them because you only make them stronger. Let them just be like background television.
Live in the present moment
These obsessive negative thoughts are based on the past or the future. Try to live in the present, focus on what is happening now: What is the room you are in like? Is it warm, cold? is there noise? And your clothes, are they comfortable? soft, rough? What is the person in front of you talking to you about? Try again and again to do this type of exercise, at first it is more difficult but with practice it will be easier for you to concentrate and live in the present moment.
Don’t try to make sense of them
How to eliminate negative anxious thoughts? Think that they are irrational thoughts. Don’t try to make sense of them, don’t spend time on them. Don’t try to change them, they just don’t make sense. It’s like arguing with a wall, it’s better not to bother and get on with your things.
We tend to constantly try to look for solutions, look for meaning in what we think, evidence that what we think is real. Try not to do it, to ignore those thoughts. If it turns out that they anticipated the future realistically, great, but at least you haven’t been suffering in advance.
Practice visualization
There are several types of mindfulness meditations that teach you how to visualize how those thoughts go away. This is very useful to get them out of your mind and move on with your life. Just like the other steps, it takes practice but, without a doubt, it is worth it.
Stop trying to control the uncontrollable
We cannot change the past, nor can we control what others will do in the future. Stop coming up with a thousand hypotheses about what can be done and how someone could change. The only thing you can control is what you do. Focus on yourself, on being in the present moment, on letting everything else flow without having to intervene in it, on relaxing and stopping controlling those thoughts. Just ignore them like when a child has a tantrum for no reason.
Do relaxations
Relaxation serves to reduce the level of activation of the body, which is precisely what causes anxiety with obsessive and recurring negative thoughts. There are many . Find the one that works for you.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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Bibliography
- Hayes, S. C. (2015). Acceptance and commitment therapy. Desclée De Brouwer.