Hello.
I have been reading posts for quite some time and searching without success for a problem similar to mine and related to the crisis I am suffering with my partner.
Apart from what is mentioned in this and in others, my main problem comes from my partner, that her idea of being a good mother involves crushing the rest of the family members, of which I, because I am the one who spends the most time with her , I take the worst part.
I am referring to things like blaming you for everything that happens to our son, telling you how to do and act with him, making only the plans that she sees fit, because according to her, “I am his mother and I know what the child wants and needs.”
The worst stage I remember was when the child began to walk and inevitably fell from time to time. If it was with her, I never said anything to her, but if it was the other way around, phrases like “wow, father” always came out of her, “you’re not paying attention,” “the one waiting for you with your father,” “I’m always going to have to take you.” me” and things like that, which added to my displeasure at seeing my son cry, caused me great pain, which in turn turned into fury since it seemed totally unfair to me.
I dedicate almost 100% of my free time to playing and being with my son, I do all possible tasks at home, but he always looks for a moment of relaxation or something unexpected to throw in my face, always using my son to hurt me.
My son is now two and a half years old and I think I have lost patience with her.
He has always been a person with character, but without children involved I didn’t care so much.
I don’t know if couples therapy can be a solution to our case, but I am horrified by the idea of separation (which I have been considering for quite some time) and potentially harming our son.
All the best