Terminating a pregnancy, whether naturally or directed, is a traumatic experience for many couples. It can be a difficult and emotionally intense decision and requires a great deal of emotional and physical support. Each person and couple is different and may experience different emotions and psychological consequences after an abortion.
It is important that couples who live this experience receive the support and recognition they need. In this Psychology-Online article, we explain the psychological, physical and emotional consequences after an abortion and how to overcome problems in the couple after an abortion.
Psychological consequences of an abortion on the couple
It must be taken into account that an abortion is a traumatic and stressful event in a woman’s life, regardless of whether it has been provoked or not. The psychological consequences refer to the mental and/or emotional consequences that may arise after an abortion. Specifically, the main psychological consequences for a woman who has had an abortion are:
- .
- Poor adaptive response to stress.
- Mood disorders, especially manifestations of anxiety and/or depression.
- Intense emotionality, such as aggression and irritability.
- Reduced ability to establish lasting bonds and stable relationships.
- Appearance and/or worsening of .
- Loss of sexual desire.
- Clinical manifestations of pathological grief.
It is worth mentioning that some psychiatric manifestations in people who have had an induced abortion are associated with the nature of the abortion; but, in other cases, These symptoms are associated with factors related to making the decisionthe emotional bond with the couple, the quality of family relationships, the previous state of mental health, the environment generated around the event and the existence of a life project.
Thus, problems in the couple after an abortion can be significant, since the abortion can have a great psychological impact on the couple. Some of the psychological consequences of an abortion on the couple include:
- Emotional pain and suffering: Abortion can be a traumatic and painful experience for both members of the couple. They may feel responsible, guilty or sad about the termination of the pregnancy.
- Changes in relationship dynamics: Abortion can affect the dynamics of a couple’s relationship and how they communicate and support each other. Disagreements may arise about how to manage the abortion and how to support each other during this difficult period of time.
- Anxiety and stress: Abortion can cause anxiety and stress, due to uncertainty and fear about the future, as well as the responsibility and emotional burden of the decision.
- Changes in sexuality: Abortion can affect a couple’s sexuality and how they feel about sex and intimacy after abortion. If it happens to you, you can consult this article about .
- Feelings of isolation: The couple may feel isolated and unsupported due to lack of understanding or social stigma associated with abortion.
Feelings after a voluntary abortion include much of guilt, which is inevitably aggravated by the political atmosphere surrounding abortion in many societies. However, no matter how strongly they believe their decision was right, grieving parents worry about being criticized by others for the decision they made.
According to Major and his collaborators, a month after the abortion, a positive balance is observed in the emotional sphere compared to the first days. However, the psychological manifestations They usually reappear spontaneously after a year or in the presence of critical existential events, such as a new pregnancy or a grieving process related to another cause, not necessarily linked to the primary event.
Physical consequences of an abortion on the couple
Abortion is a procedure with a high impact on physical health, as it can lead to immediate or long-term complications. The physical consequences of abortion can be defined as those effects produced at the organic level as a result of performing an abortion, whether spontaneous or provoked. Among the physical consequences of abortion are:
- Abdominal pain: The person who has had an abortion may experience abdominal pain during the medical procedure and in the days following the intervention.
- Vaginal bleeding: It is also common to experience vaginal bleeding during and after abortion.
- Fever and chills: Some women may experience fever and chills after abortion.
- Nausea and vomiting: Women who have had an abortion may experience nausea and vomiting after the procedure
- Fatigue: After the procedure, the woman may feel exhausted and need to rest for the next few days.
The physical consequences of abortion on the couple are generally minor and usually temporary, so They should disappear in a few days. Still, it is important to remember that each person is different and may experience different symptoms and physical reactions after an abortion. If symptoms persist or worsen, it is important to speak with a health professional. Especially, the physical consequences of an abortion on the couple are:
- Hemorrhages abnormal.
- Localized infection and, in serious cases,
- Pain related to intercourse recurrently.
- Fertility disorderssuch as difficulties with conception and infertility.
Emotional consequences of an abortion on the couple
Abortion can be a traumatic experience for the couple due to the loss of the pregnancy and the difficult decision that must be made when carrying it out. Next, we will highlight the main factors that influence the emotional consequences of an abortion on the couple.
The desire to have it
The critical factor is desire, not gestational age. The elective abortion of an unwanted pregnancy, although often accompanied by certain sadness, rarely causes long-term psychological trauma. The reaction is usually in the realm of fantasy: “I wonder what the baby would look like.” For these cases, in this article, we show you.
On the contrary, several studies suggest that the loss of a desired pregnancy, regardless of gestational age, is experienced more as a grief due to perinatal death than as an elective abortion.
Procedure delay
Often, couples’ problems after an abortion are due to planning ahead for a baby, perhaps timing conception and birth to fit the context of family life. Much of the emotional consequences for the couple are caused by the delay of the procedure and by the denial in this stageboth the life and death of the fetus.
Additionally, pregnancy loss can be particularly difficult for older couples, or those who have previously experienced infertility or pregnancy loss. However, unlike other pregnancy losses, genetic abortions are especially poignant because the parents make the decision not to continue the pregnancy. The feelings of guilt and remorse are common after an abortion, as are sadness and depression.
Physiological and emotional bond with the baby
The bond grows as the pregnancy progresses. While fathers may not become emotionally involved until later, mothers experience physiological changes in their bodies almost immediately. The emotional involvement is accelerated by recent technological advances that make early pregnancy detection possible, often before the first menstrual period.
The Ultrasound also has an important role in the emotional pain of the couple. Visual images of the anatomy and movement of the fetus serve to enrich and elaborate the mother’s pre-existing mental images of the fetus. In fact, it is very common to keep a copy of an ultrasound as “the baby’s first image.”
Psychologically, the mother’s perception of fetal activity is what causes her loss to cause a high emotional distress.
Advanced age of the parents or previous infertility
An important factor regarding the emotional consequences of an abortion on the couple is the advanced age of the parents and previous infertility or the loss of the previous pregnancy, which increase the investment in the current pregnancy and they intensify the mourning for their loss. In this article you will find more information about it.
Paradoxically, then, the attention focused on early pregnancy by diagnostic procedures provides a more intimate awareness of the fetus as a separate being, highlights parents’ hopes and fears and improve the bond. The baby, who will not be born, or will not be born alive, is considered irreplaceable, regardless of gestational age, and her death is deeply mourned.
Baby genetic abnormalities
For couples at risk of having a child with chromosomal abnormalities, the other options available can be even more complicated: having a child with major difficulties that affect the quality of their life. Significantly, there is no evidence that couples who have experienced the confusion associated with such an abortion regret their decision. Most emphasize that for them it was the right decision.
Parents may irrationally blame themselves for the genetic condition that caused the abnormality of the baby. Lieff Benderly noted that the couple feels they have done everything they can to have a healthy baby, including taking the socially responsible step of prenatal diagnosis to ensure the child’s health. However, “in their own eyes they may carry deep guilt, seeing themselves as the problem.”
Furthermore, they are aware that a similar outcome is possible in future pregnancies. As Blumberg, Golbus and Hanson stated, abortion in such circumstances shakes the foundations of self-esteembecause this depends in part on unconscious faith in “the ability to create a healthy family.”
One woman interviewed in such a study, the mother of a healthy child who in her second pregnancy had an abortion after a diagnosis of Down syndrome, stated the following: “It shakes the image you have of yourself as a good mother. I needed to have people to confirm that I was a good mother.
Personal history of parents
Problems between couples after an abortion can be increased by the guilt of having lost the baby and by the parents’ personal history. Women who have previously had an elective abortion can feel like they are being punished. Women who were unwanted or abused daughters may feel like they are abusive parents because they decided to break up.
These issues can potentially resurface in very powerful ways and complicate the duel. This process it gets more intense and lasts longer than most people anticipate. Its duration surprises many parents and increases its feeling of isolation. Family and friends, even…