If your partner is broken, it is very likely that you will spend most of the time arguing and you will want to spend less and less time together. It is also likely that the desire to have sexual relations with your partner has disappeared and that you may even feel certain hunches and negative premonitions about the relationship that may be a bad omen for the future of the relationship. Deep down in your heart there will be signs that the relationship is very bad, even if it is a very difficult reality to accept.
What is clear is that a couple is the responsibility of both and when love ends it is necessary to make the best decisions for the well-being of both. In this Psychology-Online article you will learn how to know if a couple is broken so that you can act in the best possible way in that difficult situation.
His presence bothers you
If your partner has broken up, whatever you do you are going to bother him, even if it is for trivial things like talking on the phone in front of him, listening to music or even because spaces coincide with your partner. For your part, you probably feel like you can’t stand his voice or his laugh anymore, and intense desire to get away from his presence.
You will feel that you must tread very subtly so as not to irritate your partner, which will keep you at an eternal level of anguish and discomfort.
There is no trust
Trust is the backbone of any relationship. For this same reason, if this is lost, there will not be much left to do. You may have lost that trust. that was between you due to some infidelity, due to or lack of communication.
In some cases, mistrust can also be due to some insecurity problem in your partner or because it reflects their own shortcomings in you. If that is your case, the most sensible thing to do is to run away from that type of relationship.
He blames you for everything that happens
Another sign that your relationship has broken down is that you always He will blame you for all the arguments or problems you have.
As we already mentioned, when you have a partner, both parties must do their part to maintain balance and for everything to go as smoothly as possible. However, when all the responsibility falls on you it will mean that he is no longer interested in putting effort into the relationship.
A very toxic dynamic is created
One of the most obvious signs that your partner is broken is the presence of a toxic dynamic in your relationship. When a couple experiences a toxic dynamic, the negative and destructive behavior patterns They become recurrent, making communication and emotional connection difficult.
For example, they live in a constant state of conflict, heated arguments and insults where there will always be mutual disrespect that can be emotional, verbal or even become physical in extreme situations. In this article we explain to you.
The complicity ends
It is usual that when a couple breaks up, signs of complicity or mischief are no longer apparent. For example, you will no longer be able to appreciate that shine in your eyes from long ago and your heart will stop racing when you see it/arrive because your feelings towards that person are no longer the same as when you loved each other.
Likewise, you may even stop sitting together and avoid touching or talking to each other, as you will no longer have anything good or interesting to say to each other. Therefore, if your partner no longer responds to your gestures or seeks closeness, it may mean that you already started going your separate ways a long time ago.
There is no improvement in the relationship
It is normal for couples to go through ups and downs throughout their relationship, but when love is true, they will know how to get back on track. However, when the couple is irreparably broken, there will be no improvement in the problems and Every day you will feel more suffocated in the relationship.
If they do not have the strength to recover from adversity and do not show interest in solving problems and moving forward, it is better that they speak sincerely and that everyone continues on their own side.
You no longer want to have sexual relations
It is normal for passion to cool a little in any relationship over time and you have to look for ways to rekindle it. However, when you no longer feel any sexual desire for your partner or never wanting to be intimate can be another warning sign that the relationship is broken.
The same thing happens if you feel that sex is an activity that you have to do “out of obligation” and not because you really feel like it, as this is clear evidence that the gossip between you has already been extinguished. In this sense, it is important to remember that you should never do anything you do not want to do or fall into social pressure or pressure from your partner.
However, before jumping to conclusions, try to talk to your partner to rule out other possible reasons for this situation, such as a mental health problem that reduces libido, or that he is within the asexual spectrum and does not experience sexual attraction.
You don’t want to sleep together
One of the most obvious signs that there is no longer love in the couple is that you never feel like sleeping together. It is normal that at some point you prefer to sleep apart because you have argued, however, when the relationship is broken you will not tolerate being so close and you will end up sleeping in a room or in separate beds whenever possible.
In addition, lack of love in the couple will also cause intimacy and physical proximity to be practically non-existent and intolerable.
You take refuge at work
If you have the feeling that your partner often works overtime voluntarily or that you yourself you don’t want to get home early to avoid spending a lot of time with your partner, this may be a sign that the relationship has broken down and you are looking for ways to avoid meeting each other.
Plus, there will always be the excuse of going out with friends or doing anything that doesn’t involve being with you because you will no longer be important in your partner’s life.
You have different goals and life plans
Finally, another way to confirm if your relationship has broken down is to realize that You no longer have goals or plans in common. or hope for a future together. In other words, each member of the couple will plan her future in her own way and her life goals no longer involve you, but become individual goals.
The most sensible thing in these cases is to think about what is best for you and look for a new destination where you will be truly happy. In the following article we explain to you.
This article is merely informative, at Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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Bibliography
- Cowan, P.A., & Gottman, J.M. (2004). The end of a relationship: How to overcome a separation or divorce. Barcelona, Spain: Paidós.
- Fromm, E. (1956). The art of Loving. Barcelona, Spain: Paidós.
- Gottman, J. M. (1994). Why do couples separate?: The seven golden rules for building a happy and lasting marriage. Barcelona, Spain: Paidós.
- Gottman, J.M. (2011). When love ends: How to save a broken relationship. Barcelona, Spain: Paidós.