Is it hard for you to get rid of old ones? Are there parts of yourself that you would like to change but resist? Sometimes in order to develop another way of seeing our life, we must first learn to unlearn.
In the following article we explain what this process consists of and what we can do to achieve it.
Life as a process of rebirth – Enric Más Cerca
In this podcast Enric Corbera develops the concept of unlearning through overcoming losses and transforming old beliefs.
The art of unlearning
Unlearning as an adaptation mechanism
Throughout our lives we have learned both at home and at school.
We have accumulated information without filtering it, without stopping to distinguish what is useful to us from what is not, what makes us happy from what simply helps us to survive.
And there comes a moment in which, whatever the circumstances, we find ourselves at a turning point, at a moment of balance in our own lives in which we begin to question certain some habits and many inertia.
The art of unlearning ☀
In this conference Enric Corbera explains the key aspects of unlearning and shares the main concepts presented in his book “The art of unlearning”
Usually, we arrive at this momturning point either by accident, an illness, a crisis or a painful experience.
We know we need new information, new sources of inspiration, but where to start?
Also How is it that what we know no longer serves us? If until now we have worked in a way
Why do we question our way of doing things? The simple fact of asking ourselves these questions summons us to an interior look that, perhaps, until now we have not done or for which we have not yet found answers.
Doubt as the cornerstone of knowledge
When we question ourselves on a personal level, we are doubting our entire system and even our .
Stopping identifying with what we have learned, questioning its effectiveness and asking ourselves what is there about ourselves in our behavior is the first step to integrate new information.
Let’s imagine for a moment that we write new words in a notebook on top of already written pages.
Instead of having a new text, what we will end up with is a series of illegible and confusing scribbles which, far from being new information, will prevent us from understanding and reading.
Therefore, it is essential to take into account that Even more important than learning something new is understanding that our way of seeing the world is optional and learned.
Keys to learn to unlearn
Release the weight of what no longer serves us
It is very difficult to add information in already occupied spaces. Before writing new information we will have to clear the notebook.
Continuing with this analogy, the Hungarian psychiatrist Thomas Szasz says that ““deleting” a thought requires more courage than intelligence”.
It would be like letting go of a float that one day we need to survive but, with time, maturation and, above all, due to the change of circumstances, we no longer need it.
What we have received is neither good nor badis the one that our system has considered adequate to ensure our .
He has transmitted it to us in the form of and values and we are expected to give continuity to a concrete way of living.
For this reason, it is about thanking all the information received as a resource for life and valuing what has been learned in order to continue growing.
Understanding the positive intention of what we were taught is when we get in touch with ourselves, we stop and, and we are prepared to transform it.
Waking up means unlearning.
— (@ECIinstitute)
unlearn example
Let’s give an example, a person has spent his whole life prioritizing work over everything else, considering that before family or leisure, work comes first.
One day you decide that you want to change your order of priorities, more, spend more time with your loved ones… since this is what you want, you begin to act accordingly, you begin to “do” everything that you consider consistent with your new way of seeing your life.
However, there is a part that worries him, he has thoughts full of judgment towards himself, there is very deep in your being that make you feel uncomfortable.
When we exert purely behavioral changes, it’s like putting a bandage on a wound without first healing it.
In this case it is important to understand that your attitude towards the worked It is not something random or voluntary.
In order for him to express this behavior, there is a series of beliefs that he structured in childhood.
In his family system this belief was very useful, that is,He had a good unconscious reason for choosing this attitude.
A change at a profound level implies understanding the origin of their way of understanding the world and, little by little, being able to “undo” these beliefs.
We call this .
In fact, this new belief system that we chose will someday also become obsolete, and we must be prepared to let it go when that time comes, thankful for all that it brought us.
That is put our intellect, our mind and our conscience at our service, and not the other way around.
Conclusion: Learn, unlearn and relearn
Life is a continuous process of readaptation to the context
Bioneuroemotion proposes learning to unlearn through thanks to all the information that we can observe in our our relations and our circumstances.
More than everything we know, what defines our success and our well-being is the flexibility with which we are able to approach the different stages that take place in our life path.
There is no greater freedom than the one offered to us by our ability to rectify, adapt and change.
“In times of change, those who are open to learning will own the future, while those who think they know it all will be well equipped for a world that no longer exists.”
Eric HofferAmerican writer and philosopher.